I’m really sorry for your pain Liz.  I had 2 aunts who circumstances prevented then from marrying and having children of their own, but they were such an important part of our family.  One did when I was still a child, but the other passed in her 90s just a few years back.  I can tell you that she changed my life for the better – much better, and I a m eternally grateful.

The “other granny” sounds to me that she was jealous and felt threatened, that she sees genuine affection these grandchildren have for you.  I was only able to have one child, and he and his partner have chosen not to have children. So I did get to have a child of my own, but it seemed to go very quickly.

Fortunately for me, whilst my income is modest, and I don’t travel, I have a little home of my own.  I live alone with my 2 dogs who are like little children to me.  My son and I live quite a distance away. We only get to see each other a few times a year but speak on the phone for a short while each week.

I bet that you are a very especial aunt and that they all love you so much. I did become a great aunt in the last year but haven’t gotten to meet the little one yet as my famiIy are all interstate.

Aunts c a n be special and so are many step-parents and step-grandparents – and those kids most likely j u st see you as granny, not step-granny.