Anita thsnk you again.  I had always ended up apologising to him for being needy or when I called him out on things when I felt he was unfair . He always had this knack of making me feel I was in the wrong . I knew at the time I should never have to apologise for telling some one how I felt .

my friend who knows about this said I’m still hurting and grieving the loss of someone I thought was a real friend because I opened up to him about everything, he tapped every vulnerability I had . In hindsight he opened up to me about practically nothing , an odd thing slipped through but from his side it was superficial stuff like what he was cooking for their dinner etc . She said because I felt close to him it will take me time to feel happy again.