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Dear anita
In context to my family I do feel very lonely. I do think that my parents don’t really know how to handle emotions, so they don’t even know how to handle mine. They used to say that I have no reasons to cry if nobody died. My father decouraged me in my young age to trust people in general. Because nobody cares if you are not good in what you are doing and even will try to push you down for their own benefits. It was a long and hard way to learn to trust and connect with people. There were a lot of hurtful experiences with people where I struggled alone. Even if I still struggle, I can at least say I changed to the better. I am trying to find connection outside from my family. I am more confident since I moved out. I need that physical distance to not fall back to the habits of helplessness and resentment towards my family. I really want people around me who get me and help me to grow as a human being. I want people I can rely on and trust. I want connections that matter to me not only in my best performance.
Sesha