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Reply To: What was your “dark night of the soul like”?

HomeForumsEmotional MasteryWhat was your “dark night of the soul like”?Reply To: What was your “dark night of the soul like”?

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Anonymous
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Dear Reader:

I am typing this in a meditative state of sorts, not in any rush or with a goal in mind:

What other people think of me is none of my business, as the saying goes. Does it happen that a bad person (certain world leaders come to mind) are thought well of by many simply because of their power? Yes. Does it happen that a good person is thought badly or poorly of by many because they find something superficial that is displeasing in the person: the volume of his voice, the color of her hair, his accent, her way of walking, etc., etc.? Yes.

Are there things about me that are displeasing to others? Yes. Does it mean that I am a bad person? No. Is there a way for me to not displease anyone? No. There will always be people who will be displeased by me, including some of the people reading this very post (assuming anyone is reading it). Many people over the years who read my replies don’t like me/ my writing. I myself don’t like my overly-academic sounding writing style, which I would like to leave in the past. I don’t like it that I used to be judgmental of members. But over time and intent I am trying to be a better and better person, healthier, more genuine and a good person regardless of what people think of me. There will ALWAYS be people who will think poorly or badly of me. There will ALWAYS be people who will think poorly or badly of ANYONE, including themselves. Nobody escapes being thought of badly or poorly by other people.

Why would I expect a person who thinks poorly of herself to think highly of me? I wouldn’t like anyone to think of me as superior or inferior, just as I don’t want to think of anyone as superior or inferior to me.

It doesn’t make any sense, does it, that I should care what others are thinking of me, good or bad. Isn’t thinking poorly of others born out of anger and/ or discontent? When I encounter a person thinking poorly of me, the origin of their thinking is their anger or discontent, not me.

“One heart beating in all” means that we are all equal, all the same person, different appearances but the same person. People who think poorly of me are the same person as me. It’s just that I am becoming more aware of it now than those who think poorly of me.

This equality I am referring to, this same-person awareness is a spiritual transformation and I need to not forget it, not keep it on top of a figurative mountain and walk down to the valley of my daily life without it.

The only way to increase one’s self-esteem is to increase one’s esteem of everyone.

Spiritual transformation is shifting from ego-living (I vs them) to soul-living (we).

I think that every person’s soul gets injured within the first decade of life. A severe soul injury becomes evident when a person has gone too far from soul-living and for too long, having committed acts of emotional and/ or physical violence against others that clearly show that the person has no awareness or interest in that “one heart beating in all”.

It is soul injuries that are behind people thinking of others as inferiors (or superiors). It is soul injuries that are behind treating people poorly, behind being judgmental of people… behind making fun of others, gossiping, mistreating, abusing. When person X injures person Y’s soul, anyone who interacts with either X or Y may pay the price by being ridiculed, insulted, and/ or mistreated in some way.

We are all soul injured by the time we are 10 (says I), so it is no wonder that we soul-injure others in one way or another in the next decades of life. The nature of soul injury is that it propagates itself by injuring the souls of others. Spiritual transformation is about accepting this sad fact that we did indeed harm others, make amends to them whenever possible or wise, and become more and more soulful people who do-no-harm. Carrying useless, lingering guilt for wrongs done, wrongs that cannot be undone is keeping that soul injury bleeding and bleeding. And for as long as a soul injury is bleeding, it will keep propagating itself and more harm will be done to others.

We all create waves, no matter how much we may try to not create any waves: we all draw the attention of and make an impact on others in one way or another. Better we make our waves soul friendly.

The reason our world is in such a sad state is not because there is a scarcity of intelligence and education but because there is a scarcity of soul living and an abundance of ego living. In regard to governments, political figures and financial giants who fail us- they fail us because it is their egos that govern and impact us. Their souls are severely injured and they create and have created a global soul injury, soul injuring many billions of humans, animals, plants and other living things.

anita