Hi Silent Rossi

I agree with you about online dating. The statistics for men are shockingly awful to connect with matches. I do believe your goal to meet someone in person is a sensible one.

I understand where Jupiter is coming from. Personally, I refused to date anyone who didn’t take the time to get to know me as a person because asking me before they knew me felt very superficial.

One difficultly of befriending people and then dating is that people can lead you on. So my recommendation is not to leave it too long before asking someone out. A month is more than enough.

As a woman, I found it difficult when men befriended me, only to ask me out. Then abandoned the friendship when I said no. So it’s important to consider if friendship is something that you are happy to continue with someone who says no. It’s also important to accept no as an answer and emotionally move on.

Dating is very tricky because it is a lottery. When someone says no, it doesn’t reflect poorly on you. Even the most attractive men get rejected.

We all have ideas of what we are looking for in relationships on top of chemistry. My question to you is what traits do you think are important in a partner?

For me, kindness is important because abuse sucks. Talent/skill/passion are very attractive. Communication skills are generally important. Mental and physical health are beneficial. Confidence is also attractive. Taking care of your appearance (wearing well fitting clothes, styled hair etc) is a good way to show that you care about yourself. I think responsibility is an important trait when it comes to serious relationships as ultimately the plan is to build a life with a partner.