Dear humour,

if you relate to these things, then you too, like me and so many others, are probably suffering from Complex PTSD (C-PTSD), which is another word for childhood trauma. A good book on C-PTSD is “A practical guide to Complex PTSD: Compassionate Strategies to Begin Healing from Childhood Trauma“, by Arielle Schwartz.

Another great book to start with, perhaps a little easier read, is “Running on Empty: Overcome your Childhood Emotional Neglect“, by Jonice Webb.

I did not have any communication with my mother growing up. She used to be very busy. Its only since a few years we talk to each other.

This sounds like you were emotionally neglected by your mother. She was so busy that she didn’t have time for you, not even to talk to you, not to mention meet your emotional needs, such as soothe and calm you down when you’re upset, protect you, cheer you on, praise you, encourage you etc etc. If your mother didn’t really pay attention to you, she couldn’t meet your emotional needs either, and as a result, you couldn’t develop self-confidence and other capacities for happiness…

You said you never went on holidays, never spent time together, never even had a meal together… Was it because both of your parents worked incredibly hard, practically non stop? But even so, how come you never had a meal together?

You also said you wanted to make your family happy. What have you tried to do, which you hoped would make them happy? Of course, if you’d like to share…