Thank you so much for your thoughtful response anita, I truly value it.

There is great truth in this and I did just that, I accepted my anger and welcomed it in every mediation to be here with me, to feel free to come and go as it wants, I will continue to do so. At the same time I tried to look deeply into my brothers existence and understand his suffering to gain compassion and understanding, both of these things helped me tremendously already. As a third practice I now ALWAYS hug my brother when I see him and listen to him thoroughly when we talk, to give as much attention as possible in order to not just practice on my cushion, but to also live what I try to practice.

again, thank you for your reply, thank you for the quotes which help me to understand more deeply and to keep on walking the path 🙂

Greetings Lukas