Thanks again for all the help Tee,

I think I struggled to open up to my parents through almost thinking how I was treated by my so called mates was normal behaviour maybe or maybe I was a little embarrassed to bring it up, whether through not wanting my parents to think there was a problem or me not wanting them to see I was having a problem. There were times my parents would pick up on things and would say such and such is not a good friend and they would sometimes not like some of my friends so maybe they picked up on some bits.

In the relationship, yeah I feel better for bringing everything up in some respects I suppose I’m having trouble dealing with the aftermath now, again feeling guilty for what I set in motion and guilty that I left and hurt my partner. I also get triggered by social media posts about guys who don’t appreciate the girl they had and lose them and how the girl is better off without them, so I guess I take this on myself as I have given up and I’m the bad guy. I think if I’m honest her relationship or lack of one with her child has always bothered me, or at least the fact she has never fought harder to be involved, but you’re right, now I feel guilty like I should be more understanding and accepting and it was my fault she never felt safe enough to open up. I do feel guilty for leaving and maybe it’s that guilt that is making me keep going back, like I need to make up for it, but then the issues why I left are still there.