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Reply To: am i in love? please help!

HomeForumsRelationshipsam i in love? please help!Reply To: am i in love? please help!

#427381
anita
Participant

Dear Renn:

With regard to not always letting myself experience emotions fully: I think I kind of mean there comes a point where I’m just like ‘what’s the point moping’… It’s just like ‘we’re all still alive and happy so its fine’ Quite often in situations I just don’t bring it up  and genuinely it just stops bothering me… I just think there’s often bigger fish to fry and what I consider important/a big thing maybe isn’t always the same to the people I’m around“-

– I am bamboozled (I like the word I just used) by your maturity and healthy state of mind!!!

To be honest, the biggest things to me that I would really lay it all on the line for are just a few of my family and the farm I pretty much live at, my animals and stuff. I’ve got a really close best friend from this farm who shares a lot of her central values with me. I don’t think anyone could ever get between me and these few things. So anything else ever is just… not AS important to me… That’s I think what I mean, probably sounds really weird!“-

– no, it sounds to me really healthy and mature. As I read the paragraph I quoted right above, I tried to memorize it and apply it to my own life. I wish many people read it..!!!

And the ‘therapist friend’ thing: I’m very black and white, like brutally honest I think… I as a kid..  could always tell when people said something they didn’t mean, and it used to bother me…  I’ve taken the stance that if someone’s clearly not fully divulging how they feel then there’s no use pushing them into it even if I know what they really feel like“-

– I am continuously bamboozled in a very positive way by what I am reading!  To summarize your wisdom in this post: 1) You know your  solid values and priorities (family, farm, super close friends), you are anchored in them, and so, you don’t get blown away in the wind by less important things, (2) You understand that what you consider important is not what everyone considers important, (3) You understand that when people don’t say the truth about how they feel, when they are beating behind the bush, it’d be a bad idea to push them to say how they truly feel. You understand that for many, it’s not easy to be straight talkers, but it is your preference and choice

People in general really hate the brutal honesty (but respect it) and therefore may come to me for advice“- can you give me an example of a brutally honest advice that you gave someone who appreciated it, and an example of a brutally honest advice that was not appreciated?

anita