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Reply To: growing up – becoming adul / procrastination – in connection to childhood trauma

HomeForumsTough Timesgrowing up – becoming adul / procrastination – in connection to childhood traumaReply To: growing up – becoming adul / procrastination – in connection to childhood trauma

#432693
anita
Participant

Dear Robi:

It’s soo hot already.. the only reasonable time to train is either early morning or evening“-  the high today in Alicante was 28 degrees Celsius; tomorrow: 27. Humidity: 57%. (Temperature in Warsaw: 20 degrees Celsius, humidity: 28%)

There are some news however! On Saturday the manager of that beach bar told me we won’t cooperate anymore… I will be left without the school job as well, next month“- no reason to stay in Alicante!

On Monday..  my body felt like it’s been hit by a train – horrible headache and very dense mental fog… I was still in a pretty bad state when a friend called me and told him about wanting to leave Alicante, and how I really felt here.. Next thing you know, I felt like I just woke up in the morning full of energy“- your bod says: get me out of Alicante!

I’m thinking maybe my body is showing me this job isn’t for me. Now.. finding out yesterday that I’ll be left without classes soon, I decided to buy myself a cheap ticket to Warsaw – for the beginning of June. I decided not to wait and get a very good price by buying one early. It’s funny because my girlfriend will be here for 8 days and she’ll be going back to Warsaw  the same day I will – but we’ll have different flights“- enjoy Alicante together with your girlfriend. Average Mediterranean water temperature in June is 22.7 degrees Celsius, so if it’s too hot on the beach, go into the water. (You know this already, I know).

These days I kept applying to all sorts of jobs there (in Warsaw), every day. Let’s see… if I don’t yet have any work maybe go to Transylvania and spend some time ‘home ‘. Well that’s where I’m from and where my parents live“- it’s definitely a good idea to look for work in Warsaw. And, by the way, my father was from Bucharest, Romania, 5 hours and 25 minutes drive south east of Transylvania. I am.. half Romanian.

but not sure it feels like home. Sometimes it does. I don’t know.. there’s something in me that wants to go there for a bit –  couple of weeks will be okay. Maybe It’ll be good.. maybe there are still things that need to be addressed. Maybe not. We’ll see. Still.. feels better than living here, paying rent out of my parent’s pocket and not really liking it“- better not stay in Alicante, of course. Going “home”.. better get more clarity about your purpose there: what would it be? Better not be motivated by nostalgia alone (selective memory, remembering the good; forgetting the bad). Looking at the title of your thread: better you don’t procrastinate- or press the Pause feature on-  becoming an adult, by going back “home”.

Up until buying the ticket, I was looking forward to leave.. to go both to Poland and Romania.. but after buying it.. I started feeling some resistance. Is this a good thing? Maybe I could’ve thought about it more. It’s always like that!“- from psychology today, regret is “feeling a sense of loss or sorrow at what might have been”. I think that your regret is about the difference between how you wish things to be (nostalgia is part of it), and how things turn out to be. Fantasy/ wishful thinking/ remembering only the good and forgetting the bad, aka nostalgia, all go hand in hand with regret because..  Fantasy is always better than how Reality turns out.

This is why a lot of people spend the majority of their time Gaming instead of .. well, Adulting.

Thank you… I hope you are having a good day and I’d like you to know that whenever you’d like to share anything, I would be very happy to respond with my best insights“- you are very welcome. You’ve already helped me with your amazing insights into your life, your mind, it teaches me about my life, and my mind, so, thank you!

Now, I won’t be working out.  I’ll take a nap instead. I’ll have to do those 3 hours later on“- 7 pm in Alicante. I hope you are rested by now.

anita