Dear Adrianne:

“It might be that she pursued me. Or it might be more complex“- as I see it, a complex person (she) pursued another complex person (you). Few of us are simple. 

“it was more of a being ‘too much’ problem that scared them off. So perhaps I was the one who gave her attention and kind of ‘guy’ vibe as I was not a typical girlie-bestie for her, I guess?“- she was/ is too much needy, and yes, I think that you represented an atypical alternative to the men who rejected her.

“I am angry at myself that I got so close with her… Gosh, I feel like I cheated.“- you mean that by not discouraging her efforts to pursue you, you cheated on your boyfriend? But you weren’t aware, or adequately aware, at the time that she was pursuing you for some kind of a romantic/ sexual relationship.. ?

anita