Zita, I’ve been doing similar things myself. I have chosen the kind of partners that were never really pleased with me and then I sought for their approval. I don’t know what that was all about, but I know I did it, and that just means that I could stop doing that and that it wasn’t actually about me somehow being worse than others. I needed to shift my thinking a bit, and I am still shifting it. I still give my power away to other people and seek their approval a bit too much. But when ever I place my focus back on myself and what I want, and realize that it is my life and my body and my mind and I get to take care of it in what ever way I want, it feels so good…
So, there’s nothing wrong with you. Your thinking has just shifted, and you can shift it back. You are the most important person in your life, and if you keep telling yourself that someone else’s opinion matters more than your own, then that’s not a very nice thing to tell yourself, is it? Of course we want to be accepted by other people. I would say that it’s even a basic need. But that comes easier when you accept yourself first. Other people will treat you the way you think you should be treated.
I think you’ll be OK 😉
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 