hi there, as a prologue, i shall not read the other post/s that give advice but what i gathered from one which is to practice self love, i would say yes, continue to practice or start practising self love. i would also strongly urge you to find your inner core by journaling. first start describing how you are feeling and then slowly start inserting questions as if you are asking your higher guiding power and then slowly answers may start filtering. ask yourself as you feel that you are getting in touch with the higher power what should be done regarding this person you are obsessing. start asking less open ended questions and slowly after a lot of journaling, start asking more open ended questions, over time, the answer/s should come to you. please feel free to use this practice in other situations. on all accounts, pursue relationships but if you yourself are categorising this relationship then I urge you to ask yourself to reconsider this relationship. a lot of relationship advice is based on the fact that another person can only complement your life but you are to work towards finding fulfilment out of life on your own – another person cannot do that for he is trying to ensure fulfilment out of his own life! thus, i urge you to reconsider diving into a relationship with this man right now until you are clear on what you want from a relationship instead of lapping up whatever comes your way from this man. he must understand that going hot and cold is fine to test another’s interest but as it is bothering you then i believe the answer lies there – you seem to want to consider people who will be there for you and not carry out a hot and cold act. dating at any age is fun but like any other thing in life – you have to consider it with a strategy for if you don’t then there is a possibility that the other person will push his agenda at the cost of yours because after all, you don’t seem to have one. i hope this advice helps and i hope that i have not been too curt but i truly wish you the best as you handle your interactions with this man and i hope with other potential partners.