Hi Dermot,
I saw your post and feel compelled to respond to it. A lot of what you are describing is similar to what I am going through at the moment and I just wanted you to know that you are not alone. Seeing your post has actually inspired me to respond to you. That feeling of flicking the switch is something I know all to well also. It is very encouraging that you recognize the struggle you are going through and are reaching out for help. That in itself is a huge step. I also notice that you mention that you have felt this way for the last 8 years so I can’t help but wonder if something happened to upset you enough to isolate yourself this way. I know for myself it was a combination of a physical illness I was dealing with and the death of someone I loved very much. Sometimes it’s easier to build walls and push people away to help protect us from being hurt. Hopefully by talking with people and getting tips for ways to help you find your way through the it you can work towards having a more fulfilling and happy life. You still have so much life ahead that is waiting for you to join in. Maybe you could start by using some of the exercise ideas that were given and also what another person said by just taking a short walk and looking around at the trees, flowers etc. If you have a dog you could take him along and start by just setting small goals and as you get more comfortable expand them a bit more. For instance walk to the corner of your street and back the first day and when you get home write down something you saw on the way. Once that gets easier lengthen the walk and the amount of things you write. You could also work up to maybe saying hi to someone you see on the way but start small and work up to things like that. I hope to see you back on here and would love to hear of any progress you make on the way. There are a lot of nice people on this site and I know a lot of us would be hear to talk and offer support.