Thanks so much for these replies.

Inky – yes sort of, I took some time off and my boss said she needed someone more reliable and cut short my contract. I think going to a shaman is a bit far out… I live in a houseshare. The industry is journalism and I have started to look outside, but am trying not to give up on going for what I really want though applications often require lot of time to no response.

The Ruminant – everything together does feel too much at times, hence the sense of being ‘trapped’. I feel like a wounded animal on open land, too tired to try protect myself and about to get eaten up! The court case ended in February and I don’t think about it much now, although it seems to have affected my level of trust going into a new relationship. Falling out of work is my main fear, if I lose this job I think I will lose so many things and be at rock bottom with nothing at 28. The other fear is my boyfriend walking.

Hi Big Blue – I did try that and none (of 7) replied! Maybe I should try others…