Dear Elise and all the other women that are echoing her feelings,
You have already decided what you are going to do. You can end the marriage, wreck the marriage to the point of forcing him to divorce you, or take on a lover like hurley’s wife did, also ending the marriage. But in all cases the marriage is over and it is best to minimize the damage. I’m sorry that I have to say all this, especially since it lacks the tact that I could have with a person face to face, but these men are fulfilling their duties as husbands, but that’s not enough. It never will be. You no longer feel spark, which to you means that the love is gone. Loving your Spouse is a choice you make every day. You have decided that you are nolonger willing to make that choice because the men are not meeting all the requirements on your checklist. But a warning, if you leave this marriage, the next one will be the same. And the next one. Because the problem will move right into the next marriage, because it is your misunderstanding of love is a part if you and not him or the next man.
And Hurley, you were not at fault for your wife’s betrayal. Your a nice guy, you even took part of the blame for the affair, don’t be nice, set your boundaries, or you will repeat the pattern.