What can i say, whatever comes out of my mouth will be delivered with anger for all children of alcoholics who never deserved such treatment (i have an alcoholic father as well). Each case is different.
If in your situation boundaries helped you reclaim your life then don’t abandon them. That is all i have to say.
And don’t feel guilty for putting boundaries when your father is ill. You said your self that he hurts you when you are near him.
Even if it helped you being near him you can’t let one life be consumed by pain (your life) for the sake of another life(your fathers’).
Take care of yourself
George
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 