Hi Jadegoalie-

I encourage you to read my post “when pain becomes strength”. To summarize, I spent three long years going through job loss, RN licensure lost, drug dependence, divorce, home foreclosure, physical illness, suicide attempts, psychiatric hospitalization, abusive relationships, poverty, homelessness, and far more. It was hard to go through the darkness of those three years. I tried killing myself three times. I know how it feels when your world completely dissolves. Two things I want to tell you. First, this isn’t for nothing. You are enduring this dark time so that you can emerge a stronger person. I know it’s hard to see that from where you are at this moment, stuck in the midst of it, but it’s true. Not long from now, you will be able to look back and see that you survived. The other thing I would like to tell you is that life is never perfect. I encourage you to take a step back and look at your life as a whole and find what there is that you can still be grateful for. I know it sounds contrite, but it will give you the opportunity to see that not everything is bad at this moment. I made it my personal goal when I came out of the storm that I went through to not let it have been for nothing. I didn’t want the scars on my arm, my time in the psychiatric hospital, the abusive relationships, all of it, to have happened to me for nothing. I decided that I would use what I had endured to help others see that they can overcome their trials and thrive. The best part is that when you get through it, you know how strong you are. Take it one day at a time, one hour at a time if you need to. Remember, no one is perfect, there is amazing beauty in things that are flawed, wabi sabi. I hope this helps give you some solace and you will be in my thoughts.