Dear Moon:
What you want, it seems to me, is possible via a process that you already started, a PROJECT if you will. You wrote that you manage a few at the same time at work. What if the one and superior project of all is that which you define for yourself- specify the best you can what it is that you want, the aim, goal of your very personal project. Not a goal that society sets, a should-be goal, a real one, one that is authentic for you. That would be the project way above all others and all other projects are inferior to it, there to serve the superior project. Everything you do is to get you closer to the aim of the major, superior, highest project. Perhaps peace of mind, a state of mind that you will define, that you already felt at times and want more of, a state of mind that is possible (a constant ecstasy as a goal would be impossible). What do you think?

anita