Dear tiredandfedup7:
I am going to ask you questions based on quotes from your sharing, not answer the one question you asked at the end. So, if you are not interested in being asked these questions, please ignore the rest of my post.

1. You wrotte: “All my life it seems I have done nothing but rode the never ending emotional family rollercoaster.” Question: are you interested in getttting off the never-ending-emotional-family-rollercoster?

2. You wrote: “I…have always got the bad end of things and constant blame.” Question: are you interested in no longer getting the bad end of things and constant blame?

3. You wrote: “my siblings who are much older than me were able to go off and begin their lives and live as they please.” My question: would you too like to go off and live as you please?

4. You wrote: “Just with the emotional abuse alone (I’m not good enough, I’m the never should have been child, the worse one out of the seven, the loser, etc) I’m drained; emotionally and physically drained. Whenever I call my siblings to update them it’s like I’m talking to a brick wall.” My question: why do invite your siblings to experience the emotional abuse you are experiencing with your mother?

5. You wrote: “I’m married and have two young children. I don’t work mainly because of having to take my mom everywhere… I am always having to lug my children with me…when taking my mom to and from. My children…suffer from not getting to play with friends often because of my mom’s needs.” My questions: Do you indeed “having to” and Are you being fair to your kids?

anita