Dear Carlos

wow she sounds exactly like me..for a second I even thought that this was my ex writing about,me…

I felt the need to respond to your post because I know exactly how she feels…i have been there and I know what its,like to constantly push people away…somehow jus being unable to fully accept and welcome love..
each time I had one of my moments…(as my ex used to call them)…i would l out get anxious from nowhere and all of a sudden create a problem..why we couldn’t be together,why things aren’t going to go well..i would do or say just about anything to push him away to make leave and when he gives me space,I would come to my senses and things will be back to normal…

I don’t know about your ex but when I reached and looked deeper I realized the cause of my insecurities.
see I have been hurt alot in the past and so i convinced my mind to believe that each person who comes into my life would eventually leave me…and so I would always wait for the other shoe to drop,…when things are going well that’s is when I panic thinking that the bad thing will happen next..so I would distance myself,push the person away before they can leave…
this led me to realized that deep down I didn’t believe that I am truly worthy of love from a good guy..somehow all the people leaving me in the past made me feel that I didn’t deserve it…
so when I met my ex,he was perfect but I couldn’t see him sticking around..being with me and all my insecurities,I found it hard to believe that the shoe won’t drop…and the more he got closer,the more I moved away…
(I really don’t know if I am even making sense)

I can’t tell you for sure that this is how your ex feels…
but if its even close and you want to be with this girl you need to be there for her…let her know and remind her that you won’t hurt her and that you are here to stay..go to a couples therapy with her…
that is if you love her and you still want to try things..
it won’t be easy though…