Dear Brian:

I feel nice that you created a soothing parent last night … and that you had a good conversation with the neighbors. Regarding the creating part, this is what can make the difference between automatic re-experiencing trauma and healing trauma, our ability to be creative, to create. I figured, no that I am in no contact with my real mother- all I have in my mind is the image of her. When I created my chosen mother, still, it is an image in my brain. My chosen image of a mother is way more authentic to who I am than the image of the biological mother because it is I who created the chosen one.

I hope you experiment with your soothing parent creation again and again and not give up if at any one time it didn’t produce the satisfactory results. After all nobody expects a real-life parent to be perfect, only good-enough. Same courtesy should be extended to a created parent, says I.

anita