“Hey. I hear a sound. That’s me being mindful. Do I feel good about that? Not really. I just feel kinda off. Well I know I shouldn’t judge how I feel. So why am I? How do I stop judging how I feel? This is all just making me more stressed. I should just breathe and accept these feelings. But that isn’t working. I’m still resisting. Why can’t I move past this?”

Sounds like you are resisting your resistance. Evaluating your evaluations. Judging your judgements. I do this and I’m sure a lot of people do too. There is no such thing as a perfect meditation session. Learn to love and accept your imperfect meditation sessions. Just as you learn to love and accept yourself.I think the pay off, the reward for trying, just hanging in there, is not noticeable for a while, a long while. Better not to have expectations. We are not aiming for perfection. We are aiming for acceptance of self and the present moment.