Dear Anita,

“As I read your post about the grocery store experience I was thinking what a good writer you are. You have the ability to describe a situation in such detail that I can see it, step by step. I think you have a real skill and talent, so much so that the idea of you writing for a living seems possible to me and it is exciting!” Thank you for your kind words. It is exciting, now that I am not perpetually worried about it.

“This is an All-or-Nothing thinking, isn’t it?” Oh my, you’re right!! I went to extremes in my thinking. Gosh, I feel a bit silly now.

“It is natural. It does not indicate you are a bad person, only that you were hurt.” I’m glad. For a while I was really caught up in thinking that I was a bad twisted person for feeling that way. That there was something wrong with me for thinking that way.

“Only what he thinks doesn’t really matter (hard to believe, isn’t it?)” It is hard to believe, or at least it was, a while ago. However, I came to realize that what he says or thinks about me doesn’t matter because it has no real power. It doesn’t change anything. I am where I am today, because of the effort I’ve put in, because of the choices I’ve made. Him thinking highly of me changes nothing. It is simply an opinion. Despite my rational thinking though, I still feel like I have something to prove to him. I guess deep down his opinion of me still matters a bit.