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i was almost done with this poem before pressing a wrong button and deleting it and having to retype it, I’m not sure the retyped version is as good as the other that disappeared, but I tried to replicate it. i hate it when my mind is on writing a poem and then rush hour at the restaurant comes and i must help my parents and something happens to my work, it makes me so annoyed. also especially since i spent 3 hours studying for physics honors, 2 hours typing up an ap english essay (another 30 minutes revising it) and 1 hour typing up the poem to be interrupted every now and then by customers. i hope to get straight a’s this year so i am really studying and researching. most of the time i stay after school just to avoid the rush of the restaurant and hang out in the library which is like my sanctuary, while there i can have peace and concentration with my assignments without hearing my parents argue or being nosy around my work.
here is the poem:
Living in My Dreams
Counting the days since you’ve been gone
I feel lost without you; not sure if I am on solid ground
Imagining in my dreams and memories when we were once together
Back then it was us supporting each other in the world; I felt safe with you living in a dream of love
Before we helped each other through obstacles in life.
With the angers and sorrows, the pressures of the world, you taught me how to swim when the currents of responsibility threatened to pull me under
Now we are drifting away on our separate paths in life
I’ve got to let you go
Haunted by the memories of our lost love; always going back into the dream of us together
I’ve got to break free
I can’t keep living in a dream, blinded by love, not able to let go
I’ve never felt like love like this before; you’ve taught me to trust myself and not be overly attached
Even though, I will miss you; I will keep the memories locked in my heart
I will learn and grow on my own
I will survive
Despite doubts and fears, wondering if I will be able to calculate a financial budget and time management
Sometimes I slip back to living in my dreams with you
I’ve got to believe in myself and walk this path on my own
The illusions of my childhood are shattered
Afraid to try take the weight of the world on my shoulders
I wonder if I can learn all the life skills I need to survive
I wonder if I will be guided on my way
They say that you learn through observation, but not all things that you see can be learned, sometimes you need to experience them and still be taught
I will keep the memories to guide me on my way
I’ve got to accept reality and learn to live, not in a dream world.
I know that I’m not alone because I have hope and strength
I have my spirit guides and angels helping me along the path
I am thankful to the lessons you have taught me
I am going to take the memories we shared and become a happier and healthier person, not letting the world influence who I am
I will make myself into the person I want to be
I will continue this journey alone on my spiritual path and face the reality of the world, breaking free from the illusions and my dreams of what was past.