Simple answer- yes.

Longer answer- you have put yourself in a position where you are not going to be happy with any outcome. You can stay around her and be reminded all the time of the feelings you have but can’t express, or you can confess all and possibly ruin a marriage, or you can choose to love her enough to know you have to let her go from your life. I faced some of those feelings when my marriage of 19 years fell apart and my wife wanted to leave. I could make her feel guilty and she would stay and we would both be unhappy, or I could love her enough to let her go. I “lost” either way, but I had to let her walk away because it was the right thing to do- even though it has shattered me inside. It’s not always easy to make the “right” decision. At the end of the day, which one can you choose that will allow you to look in the mirror and know you did right by her and by you?

As to how you might do that- I don’t know. I wish there was some magic answer because I could use it myself. Letting go is easy to preach, but incredibly difficult to do when you love someone. The best things I’ve found in the last year to help me have been my therapist and a lot of the blogs on this site. Read them and you may find some answers about how you want to make the move to let go.

Good luck.

• This reply was modified 11 years, 9 months ago by Jeff.