July 3, 2013 at 11:05 am #37920
Hi! I’m 18. Im in college and I most times feel as if I am an outcast. I have a few very close friends. I feel as if my personality makes life very difficult. Often times I have problems making new friends, and meeting new people. I can admit that I am very restricted and do not let people in, but that is something I am working on moving forward. I know what I want out of life, but some mornings I wake up feeling lost in a world where there is so much going on, an sometimes you can lose yourself. Is it bad that I am spiritual and I’m young? I have so many questions, as to why I am the way I am. My brain is so disheveld with so much information, I do not know where to begin. Is this something that most people encounter during early adulthood, I wish I knew why I felt the way I do. Only listening to music helps express my thoughts; and lord known it is difficult for me to even be writing this lol. I guess I’m trying to figure out my purpose is. What I am here to do… How to seperate the craziness in the world from the good.. It’s toughJuly 3, 2013 at 12:25 pm #37921
Sometimes i think when you are young you feel like you might be weird when really what you are feeling is normal, and some 50+ people or anyone of any age can feel the same as you.
Sometimes it takes time to find good friends, after school i done 3 years of college and i am now going into my second year of uni.
and ive made friends, and ive had good people come and go.. and ive only really found my real friends in uni.
and others of my friends know theirs are from school or college.
try to not over think or worry about things.
listen to happy music, see friends spend time with them, but don’t do anything you don’t want too do, like going clubbing or partying to keep in the crowd.
some people are better with just one good friend, and i have many wonderful friends but ive always been best with just the odd 2 good friends.
do things that you enjoy, like sports or something, that way you meet more people and you open up more in yourself you feel an inner peace.
hope this helps, if you need more help
i am here to help anyway i can or just to listen/read
EMJuly 3, 2013 at 1:44 pm #37923
Sometimes there are those among us who are born with a strong empathy. From your words, it sounds like you see and feel a lot of information and are unsure what to do about it. Said differently, when people talk to you, there is so much information coming in that your mind becomes overloaded and you try to figure out what to do with the pieces. Does that sound right?
Unfortunately, for right now, patience is the key. You’re still developing your frontal cortex (into your mid-twenties) which will help you put it all together. For now, take some time to learn about who you are. You have a special gift, and it is through looking inward at what your heart tells you that you will find your stride.
We don’t really need to worry about “sorting it all out” as though we have to put everything in a category in our mind. Instead, there is a different strategy.
We can consider our body like a house, and the world around us like wind blowing at the house. When the wind gets really strong (lots of data coming at us) we try to shut the front door to stop the pressure from building in our mind. Said differently, we try to ignore or parse what we see, hear, feel. What happens is we can for a little while, and then we lose strength and the door flies open and we are knocked around.
Instead, we learn to keep the back door open which lets the wind passes right through. This is done by just noticing what is there, without trying to judge or categorize the sense data. Said differently, we can say “what is really here now? breathe it in, breathe it out.” Then the moment is passes and we are ready for the next.
As you find your stride over the next few years, I have every confidence you will overcome your social difficulties. Just take some time to play and dance and sing whatever songs make your heart feel warm and strong. As you get to know yourself, people will want to be your friend because you will have so much to share and such an empathic nature.
PS: Yes, you’re weird. Thank goodness!July 3, 2013 at 7:35 pm #37935
I wouldn’t say you’re weird, you’re just different- and people should embrace it. Unfortunately many young people are far too concerned with fitting in or being “cool” and are afraid of being who they really are. I was very unique at college- I wore odd clothes, had different moral views and was wise beyond my years- I still am all of these things (I’m now 20) The good thing is, as everyone grows up they will experience things that challenge their views and teach them an understanding and acceptance, teach them things you have already learnt. Everyone else is just taking longer to grow into who they really are as they’re too busy pretending to be who they think they should be.
So just chill out and enjoy life while the others grow up a bit.
Never be worried or ashamed of who you are. Everyone seems perfect to someone, but no-one seems perfect to everyone.
ChloeJuly 4, 2013 at 2:21 am #37943
Aww….you are being harsh on yourself when you say that you are weird. We all try to think about our purpose in life and about strange ways of the world at some point in our life ( many a times actually)…..there is nothing weird about it. Trust me you are perfectly normal. Some people can make friends easily, while others find it difficult…so even that is perfectly normal.
It’s great that you are young and spiritual:-) Try focusing more on issues which interest you…and remember no two humans are similar. Enjoy the diversity the Universe offers.
Take Care.:-)July 4, 2013 at 4:35 am #37944
weird? i don’t think you are. what you are going through right now is just part of the process of growing up, things you experience during a transition period, from being a teenager to an adult. others your age may not feel the same way. i would say you are a late bloomer.
late bloomers aren’t as well-equip as their peers in dealing with all the emotional changes while growing up. there’s just a lot of things they don’t readily understand, because their capabilities usually develop at a much later stage or later than usual. their talents usually show up later in life, so there is nothing you have to worry about. finding things or demands overwhelming is just normal. you just have to take time and let your family understand.
i am a late-bloomer myself. and during that period, i had the staunch belief that opening up to the world or to people would just make me vulnerable. as time went by, i was finally able to carve out my niche, learned how to connect with people and discovered what a talented writer and artist i am. but the realization didn’t really happen until much much later. so have faith and be patient.