Hi,

I am in need of an outsider’s opinion on my current situation with my boyfriend. As a warning this post might include offensive details to some people.

We have been dating for a few months and things are going pretty well, we have good communication and have been honest with each other about everything so far. Honesty is obviously important in all relationships, but I am obsessive about needing people to be honest with me since I have been severely lied to by a past boyfriend.

Anyways, last night I shared with my boyfriend that I haven’t masturbated at all since we first started dating, which I said is abnormal for me because I typically would in my other relationships. He responded by saying that he hasn’t masturbated until he left for school (we are in a long distance relationship now). I said that wasn’t true, because I recalled this time prior to him leaving for school…after we had sex one afternoon he said he had masturbated that morning, which was why he wasn’t ready to have sex twice in a row. He then apologized and said he forgot about that time, that he didn’t mean to lie and it was a mistake. It escalated with him starting to cry because I was upset about him lying, it seemed pretty sincere. I was simply sharing that I hadn’t done it since we got together, and I said it didn’t bother me that he masturbated in our relationship but it upset me that he would say he hadn’t done it until he left for school when I knew for a fact that he had. I can’t get over that he lied to me and feeling like it wasn’t an honest mistake, but that maybe he was blowing sunshine up my a** and telling me what he thought I wanted to hear. I feel like he knew that he was lying, but he says it was an honest mistake. On the other hand, I know myself and that I’m a nazi about people being honest with me, so perhaps I am overreacting. I think we have been open and honest about everything until this point and it seemed out of character for him. Would this be a deal breaker for some people? I keep going back and forth between feeling like I should forgive him or getting the f*** out of this relationship. I know this is a very personal situation and probably difficult to relate to, but if anyone has advice/insight regarding what I should do I would greatly appreciate it.