Dealing with Bad Managers and sabotage

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    Many of us have dealt with bad managers in the past or are currently.

    My story deals with a current manager. To give some context, i work for a large organization as in a managerial position but i don’t lead a team.

    I’ve been with this business for about 3 years. 1 of them was good, the rest, pretty shit thanks to the toxic leadership and my manager.

    This manager has been in her role for 10 years, it’s a very cushy role for her and she got there by being a people pleaser.

    When I started in the business, i immediately noticed her lack of support for her team by the way she would put others in the business ahead of them and say yes to every request. She also had a favourate person within the team in which got away with whatever they desired.

    My main issue with her, is her two faced nature, she would say something to the team and then pretend to be in favour of an idea or issue we’re dealing with, meanwhile behind our backs, she completely goes and sides with others in the business and comes back with more crap for us to deal with.

    I struggle with managers who are like this, they don’t give you honest feedback and pretend everything is great. then when it comes time to a performance review, I get blind sided with a shitty rating.

    to give some context, i received a below average score last year due to my supposed low levels of engagement. The rating crushed me because there was no issue with my skillset and ability to do my job. it was just my attitude.

    I took it on the chin as i am a firm believer in the gift of feedback. So, i worked my ass off, truly, long hours, going over and above, increased my engagement, went above and beyond and i got great feedback along the way.

    I kept an open dialogue with my manager, i took every step to showcase how dedicated I am. It got recognized which was great.

    However. when it came down to my yearly performance rating, guess what, i scored a below average for the second year running. And do you want to know why, despite all the great results i achieved and the praise of my hard work.

    Because, i declined a meeting at 6am. not only that, because i wanted to be open with my manager about workload and setting the right expectations, she turns around and has the temerity to say, “besides doing x and x, i don’t know what you do to make it seem like you’re so busy”.

    understandably, I was crestfallen, after everything i did to turn things around, it was all for nothing because my manager is incapable of being a good leader. No communication, no clear feedback and no path of continued development.

    I argued my case and challenged my grade, she didn’t care. i called her out for not giving me critical feedback despite having weekly catch ups.

    I apologise if i’m ranting. This has all lead me to the realisation that some managers are just bad, they are self focused and will not help to harness your growth. Not only that, but it feels like im being actively pushed out.

    I’d love some advise or want to know if anyone has dealt with a similar situation.

    I am actively job hunting now.

    Thanks for giving me your time of day.


    Dear shordeel:

    Amazingly, you first posted here on Feb 17, 2017, seven years and ten days ago (I replied to you on that thread the day after, Feb 18, 2017), welcome back to the forums! Would you like me to study your previous 5 threads and see how the are connected to your current 6th thread, posting about it next, or would you rather I don’t?



    anita, you are also very surprising. How can you remember an answer from 7 years ago. You are so impressive.


    * Dear Timothy: thank you for the note and the sentiment. It is not all my memory though, you too can get information on a member’s past threads and posts by clicking on a member’s screen name. I just clicked on your name and I see that the above is the first post you submitted on the forums, and that you never started your own thread (or if you did, you had it deleted).

    Would you like to start your own thread on a topic of your choosing?


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