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depressing need a solution

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  • March 26, 2014 at 1:18 pm #53594
    Ron
    Participant

    Hi , I have this female best friend for whom I think I have feelings for . I have know her for almost 5yrs now . Since the first day of our meeting I had this thing in my mind that I want something strong with her in short I want her . But the scenario hasn’t been good. I am not so good looking and she is like way too much good . We both have dated or had flings with other people in past 5 yrs but for me at the back of my mind I feel she’s the right one . I am too scared of expressing myself for the fear of losing her as a friend , and also don’t want a shor term love affair with her . Nowadays it’s only her things and thoughts in my mind . We share a bond where we talk about sex , her lingerie and all the personal stuff that a husband and a wife shares . We both are young and in college but I am so confused and feel so helpless .

    March 26, 2014 at 1:33 pm #53596
    Kelly
    Participant

    Nothing ventured, nothing gained Ron. If you’re having personal discussions with her, it would seem to me that there’s some indication she may be receptive to something more than friends. But you don’t know if you don’t ask. If she’s a true friend, even if she’s not interested in a romantic relationship, she will handle your feelings delicately and with love. Good luck.

    March 26, 2014 at 3:35 pm #53603
    Helen
    Participant

    Dear Ron

    This situation is tricky, and I understand that you fear the loss of a friend. But I believe in 2 great outcomes for this situation: 1) you tell her how you’ve felt about her for the last years and you become a couple. 2) You tell her and she does not feel the same way – but you can stay friends. Yes, this will be painful, and yes, you will feel rejected if she doesn’t see you as a possible partner for an intimate relationship. But if you are truly great friends, with a little distance, you will be able to figure it out.

    I would tell her, because life is so short and it is not often that we meet people who we truly connect with.

    So I hope I could help.

    All the best to you!

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