Hi Daniella,

I regret to read that you are having such a difficult time. I have also spent many years with anxiety, depression, and attending counseling. I was also on anti depressants for about four years along with my counseling, and while I may not have been bed-ridden or institutionalized, I was not happy. I am not saying that you should not take anti depressants or not seek counseling; Only that I could not rely on them to “cure” my depression or more accurately, bring me happiness.

When I read your post two things spoke to me. First I read and see primarily mention of the past and future; Secondly, there seems to be negative voices/thoughts invading your mind. What I hope is that the following will help both.

Take some time in your day to sit down, slow down and or meditate. While you are sitting focus on a natural and peaceful breath. As you are comfortable and breathing naturally think about that exact moment when you inhale and exhale. That moment was not guaranteed to happen and it did. Try to think about that and to be grateful it happened. Then when that is through, try this again with the next breath you take. Doing this may help to bring your attention to the present. It may take some practice but will become easier each time you try. This is also taking the time to fill your mind with a positive voice/thought. By replacing the negative with something positive it allows peace and happiness to come to the surface.

I believe we all have peace and happiness inside of us that lives in the present moment. We all must find the way to that spot as it works for each of us. Be kind to yourself. You are amazing and once you see this many others will also.

Renée