Hi, I have been married for 16 years. I am an Indian and married into Indian conservative family. From the day one my mother in law made in uncomfortable, with her comments and her looks . Although I was 24 when I got married but was totally naive. When I got married I decided, I will do everything my best . And I think that a huge mistake I made. After I got married I tried to please everyone, my husband , my Mother In Law(MIL) . But I however much I did I saw she was never happy. After I got married I moved to USA as my husband was working and living here. My inlaws used to visit us every year. I used to dress according to how my MIL liked , we would eat what they liked, we would only go to places where they could go. We used to reject friends invitations if my inlaws were not invited. I would not shop when they were here because my inlaws used to think I am wasting money, My husband told me to shop in secrecy without them knowing about it. And I followed . My MIL would not talk to me properly sometimes , it came to point when my husband stopped talking to me when they were here , he would not talk to me for the whole time while they were here and try to reconnect after they left . This started issues between me and him . Its only after I got pregnant and delivered my son I realized I was not respected and valued in the house. And I that realization hurt me and I started to change. I became this hard , loveless individual. I hate my MIL from the bottom on my heart . I used to burn inside every time I used to see her . Few things she did when my son was born made me realize she is a selfish and self centered person. She came to help me after delivery, within a month she started saying that she was there not to work but for her grandson. We had huge fight because I used to be in my room as it my first experience and I didn’t know how to breastfeed , He would not latch . I used to be up in the night so I used to come downstairs late in the morning, she used to hate that . When my son was with her and if I was around and my son would look towards me , she would turn his heard the other side so he would not look at me . She did the same to my mother once when we were in India. Another thing my inlaws never respected my parents always had issues with my parents. The resentment inside me kept growing, its still there . My husband never supported me and always said that I am wrong in whatever is happening . He told me that I am messing up all his relationships. He told me I cannot keep any relationship. Always negative and always made me feel that whatever is happening around me is my fault. The result is I have low confidence , I do not feel like talking to people thinking I may screw up if I say something wrong. Things were never the same we fought and made up ..fought and made up ..still together i had my second kid ..the only thing I have achieved over the years of fighting is some respect in the house. I can shop how I want . I can dress  how I want (although I don’t when they are around to prevent any issues). However the thing I am not able to change is my hatred towards my MIL . Sometime the way she says things and the things she says really hurt . I try to just ignore but when I am PMSing , I just cannot take it and back answer her. Again the whole cycle starts . My husband tells me he cannot live with me because I have anger issues. And he will not talk to me for weeks and life goes on. It used to affect me a lot .It still does but now I try to keep happy face and try to spend my time with my kids. Looking back in my life I have suffered and I am still suffering. The only think that helps me survive are my kids . In my 16 years for whatever that have happened in my life my husband has always blamed me.