Bill,

The answer to the question “How can we be the change we want to see?” is simply to “Be the change you want to see” 🙂 I’m not trying to be frivolous, but that really is the answer. You strive to encompass the attitudes that you wish others would encompass. Whether or not that is the answer to healing the world is a philosophical question. I believe it to be. Not everyone agrees. Some think that the end justifies the means. I know people who fight against social injustice by singling out specific groups of people and attacking them. I find it to be ironic and only adding to the problem. They think it’s the solution. Who’s right? I don’t know, so I’ll leave it at that.

I would like to address your personal predicament though. I can understand the worry over the state of our world. It feels scary and frustrating when things change on a massive scale and it feels like there is no way to stop it. But for a moment, let’s step back a bit and get some distance to the issue. In fact, let’s not think about the environmental issues at all for a moment and look at something else completely.

People have all kinds of goals and dreams in life that they want to achieve. They vary from wanting to have a small garden to wanting to travel in space to wanting to learn how to draw to wanting to lose weight. The goal is different, but the way to get there hardly ever is just one big leap that is easy to take. If it was, they wouldn’t be dreams. We would’ve done it already and would be dreaming about something else. Yet there is a clear difference in attitude in different people on how to achieve the goals. There are those who will wait for the opportunity to take a couple of huge leaps and then it’s there. Smaller steps seem like a waste of time and energy. There are those who look at the goal, compare it to where they are now, and decide that it’s never going to happen. It’s impossible to achieve. Yet there are those people who somehow manage to achieve the seemingly impossible. They are often the ones who don’t think that the small steps are a waste. It may be small, but it’s a step forward. Sometimes people take some sidesteps. Again, attitude is what makes the difference. You can either think of it as a complete disaster which ruined the chances of reaching the goal, or you can see of it as an opportunity to learn what not to do in order to reach the goal.

I had this epiphany when I was attending a drawing class and simultaneously reading the book The Practicing Mind by Thomas M. Sterner. In the class I learned that drawing was a really, really slow process and it took a really long time of very detailed work to get a small thing done. It was the perfect ground for getting frustrated. But after a while I learned to love the process and just focused on it and stopped fretting over when is the drawing going to be ready. Sterner’s book had some wonderful insights about this shift in attitude as well. People constantly compare the starting situation with the goal, get overwhelmed and freeze. The project is way too daunting to overtake, because it’s too much. It takes too long and it’s too difficult. Interestingly, the people still continue to dream that they’ll reach their goal, they just stop doing things to reach it. They wait for some magical occurrence that will change everything and one day the goal has been reached. They don’t want to waste time on taking small steps, but they are content wasting time on doing nothing 🙂

You can’t change the whole world just like that. You can take small steps towards it. Instead of wasting your energy on worrying over something you can’t control, why not spend your energy on something that you can control? All big journeys start with small steps and even group activities require someone to take the first step. You are creating these hurdles to yourself by imagining that you should achieve things on a grand scale, and if you don’t, it’s not enough. That’s all ego talk. Humility and perseverance is better.

Dear Bill,

I know what you are going through. I too am concerned about where time is taking us. Whether we are headed down a right or wrong road no one can say for sure. I’ve come to believe that small gestures have profound consequences. For example: I don’t live in the cleanest city. It falls under the category “ordinary” so most cities are not better than mine. We take part in the couple of days that are set apart solely for cleaning up the city. And yes it does look brighter and more lively but I was not taken by the brief nature of the process. It is a shame to see people who’ve helped clean beside you, litter a few days later. What I decided to do is help the city and pick random trash off the street and throw it away. And when people look at you with that hopeful look full of gratitude and delight, in that moment you understand that whatever you are doing, it is bringing hope to all those people who see you. Even though I am only 1 in a city of 100 thousand people I feel special. In that way I am the change I wish to see in the world.

Best regards
Momchil