I am having guilt-related familial issues with a guy I'm about to date

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This topic has 19 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 3 days, 7 hours ago by Panditdevsharma.

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November 13, 2024 at 5:00 pm #439362

Lulu
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I’m glad you bring that up Helcat, my aunt is actually in a multi racial relationship. Her fiancee is a white man who’s quite nice. However, this doesn’t stop my mother and aunt from looking down on white people occasionally.

I’m so nervous about the moral implications of staying with him. I do care for him, and I know he cares for me. I just want to make a decision that will end with everyone happy, including myself.

November 14, 2024 at 5:16 pm #439403

Helcat
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Hi Lulu

I have faith that you can figure out the right thing for you to do. You are a good person who is just trying her best.

I understand, these things happen and you are very loyal and just trying to do right by everyone.

It is hard because systemic racism is widespread. It is difficult to trust a new person that they don’t know.

It may be a difficult conversation with your family, but know that it isn’t your fault and are doing the right thing. Sometimes grief hits people in strange ways and it gets expressed in anger at something else. I know that they are also just trying to protect you from the bullying situation regarding the therapist too. It must be very worrying for them.

Love and best wishes! ❤️🙏

November 28, 2024 at 11:48 am #439749

anita
Participant

May it be a Peaceful Thanksgiving for you, Lulu, and for your family!

anita

December 7, 2024 at 7:27 pm #440002

anita
Participant

How are you, Lulu???

anita

December 18, 2024 at 2:18 am #440822

Panditdevsharma
Participant

It’s important to address your guilt by reflecting on your values and boundaries. Open communication with the person you’re about to date and with your family can help clarify your feelings and ease the emotional conflict.
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