Gggg

Hi,

I’d really like to know whether anyone else can relate to what I’m feeling, or somebody who has maybe felt it and found their way out..

I feel really dissatisfied. With life. I try every day to look at the positives/ appreciate the good bits but this nagging feeling of ‘is this it’ is pretty relentless. I am a 32 year old female, own my own house, am single and completely independent. Before buying my property I was in a desperately dark dark relationship and as soon as I escaped it I felt a huge sense of freedom. This then highlighted how unhappy I was at work (corporate company, told off for speaking, painfully repeatative).. so I left and am now working part time in a flexible but unchallenging, quite lonely role in a windowless room and focusing my free time on my creative ambitions. I thought this would make me happy but I feel so unsettled. I have always felt this way, dreaming of running away/ starting over. I find it all so boring; working/ making money/ paying the bills/ living the same routine/ hearing the same conversations. Im sociable and will try different things in my spare time and I travel more than most. I date and get a fair amount of interest from men but find it very tricky finding anyone who peaks my interest. I’ve had several male friends want more who are lovely, so nice, tick all boxes but I’m just not interested. I’ve fallen into a casual relationship with an ex who is similar in that he is a drifter and nothing ever develops further than fun, which i know is for the best but also annoyingly demoralising. What am I missing?

Any advice/ wisdom from an outside perspective would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks, J