Hey all,

I have been following TinyBuddha since last year and only signed up today. Found this website to be very helpful and it has helped me straighten out my thoughts and feelings. A little background about myself, I am 22 years old, studying in college, pursuing an undergraduate degree now.

Approximately 2 years back, I met a guy (whom I thought he liked me romantically), let’s call him guy A. He asked me out for valentine’s and I went, but he did not say anything about romance…He always buys me presents and treat me to meal when we meet, but we never spoke about romance…

I was left in doubt, and I am usually very awkward in this aspect. I have never been in a relationship and really have no idea how things work. I want to ask him, but at the same time, I don’t know what to do if he were to say yes or no. After this 2 years of friendship, however, I felt that he was someone I could not connect emotionally with. Whenever I have some bad news, he seems to brush it off, by just asking me to simply “cheer up”. This is the reason holding me back and makes me doubt if I should even ask him what is our status now…At the same time, he comes from a very well-to-do family and seems lack the drive in his studies and life. I talked to my mum and she said things might change when he grow up a little (he is 2 years older than me), however, the emotional aspects, the lack of drive and the ambiguous state of relationship have made me feel lost in this ‘relationship’.

And just this year, met a guy (guy B) in my class. He seem really fun to be with, seemingly understanding. I only know his for about one month plus. He has been quite nice to talk to, but I also wonder if…this is just the first stage of any friendship? what I meant is that when we first got to know someone, the person is always fun to be with, it takes time to know whether you are really suitable for the person. Guy B has asked me out, but I don’t know what happen, the feeling of lost and fear comes again. I have no idea if I should go out, and because I was too shy, I said no and told him I am too shy. He replied saying that he is also shy to ask me out. We have some awkward silence but we managed to change topic eventually. Now, he sent me good morning and goodnight messages and updates me about his life quite often.

I am quite lost as to how to proceed. On one hand, I have not “settle” my feelings for Guy A, but as time goes, I feel less and less for Guy A. As for Guy B, I am not sure if it is just the honeymoon phase or am I really drawn to him.

Maybe someone can offer me a new perspective out of this situation? Would like to hear from you all.