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- This topic has 4 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 10 years, 10 months ago by Ellie.
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December 12, 2013 at 2:41 pm #46645LostParticipant
Sometimes when I’m laying down at night all I can do is cry. I dont really know why I cry but I do. Sometimes its just a few tears, other times I uncontrollably ball like a new born baby. I’m 16 years old and i’m lost. I’m lost in this world of pain and uncertainty. Everyday I wake up I continue my quest. I feel as if i’ve been on an endless search my entire life. But no matter how hard i try i just can’t figure out what is that i’m searching for. I need something to fill up this emptiness that dwells inside…I really wish i could keep writing but my lack of motivation & understanding of myself prevents me. Self doubt at its best. Peace
December 13, 2013 at 4:26 am #46670@Jasmine-3ParticipantHi Lost
I am sorry for the way you feel. Being a teenager can be a challenging task in our current society.
You are obviously spiritually evolved and this could be the reason for your immense emptiness at such a young age.
Can I pls suggest that you do not form any contracts with yourself that may cause you regret in the future. Human brain is a like a super computer. Whatever information is fed into it, it often becomes a reality. Negativity breeds negativity. You need to take small steps to break this cycle of crying as it is creating negativity in your life.
My experience has taught me that like attracts like. Start to love yourself unconditionally, accept yourself as you are (you are a perfect being) and forgive yourself for feeling so much pain and emptiness. Once you are able to do this, I can assure you that your purpose will find you and you will become a beacon of light for people around you.
Start smiling and living life. A beautiful and successful life awaits you. You just need to let the Universe know that you are ready for an awesome existence on planet earth.
Cheers
J
December 13, 2013 at 5:47 am #46674stellaParticipantHey Lost,
Sorry you’re feeing bad. I think that empty feeling is something that almost all of us have and we try to fill it up with external things -relationships, clothes, cool toys, etc. But what I’m learning now is that you kind of have to fill that space up yourself by loving yourself and showing yourself a lot of compassion. Crying might be an ok way to sort of “mourn” whatever was filling that empty space before, but maybe you should couple it with some proactive measures to be kind to yourself and be there for yourself.
If you’re really feeling lost, it might be worth it to open up to someone you trust who you think could help guide you through this time. Being 16 is not easy -there are a lot of changes happening at that age, and you shouldn’t just assume that you will be able to adapt no problem. It will pass though, and I can promise you that life will not always be sad. 🙂
I wish you the best!
December 13, 2013 at 9:27 pm #46726AlParticipantOh Lost,
Your mind is blossoming. 🙂 Sadly, for some it can be a very painful experience. Please feel some ease in knowing that there are answers. However, they will only make themselves known when they are ready to be known. As to how long this may take will depend on both you and ‘The Grand Scheme’.
For now, do your best to keep your life balanced. Sure, continue to search regardless of the fact that you’re unsure what to search for but also please make sure not to neglect the daily goings of your life (school, friends, family, future, etc…). As you mature and experience, you will gain the knowledge and insight to help you find answers.
You’ll do fine, especially if you keep your mind stimulated. It’s only when you stop thinking that you’ll fail. So as frustrating as it is, keep at it but remember to live!
December 13, 2013 at 9:31 pm #46728EllieParticipantfirst you must open your eyes, your heart, and your mind. absorb these words because they are here to help guide you. now, first and foremost you need to know one thing. YOU ARE SIXTEEN. you are at your ripest- to be enlightened, inspired, and motivated. no other age is quite like this. you have entered a new stage in your life, a stage that can sadly last many people longer than it should. this is the stage of life where you officially begin to GROW. from now on you are seeing the world through a new lens; every single thing that intrigues you, appeals to you, and ignites the fire that is your passion- each and every one of those things will shape you into the person you are meant to be. and the best thing is, you and ONLY YOU are in control of the shaping process. that is what your youth is all about- finding yourself. and as i said, for some people it takes longer than others. the ones who take a little more time than they should, are the ones who lack inspiration, creativity, and self love. it is true- these things are hard to develop, and it takes TIME. but you are SIXTEEN. do you even realize how good of a place you are in and how much time you have? from reading your passage, you do not. relax. (this is where meditation practices can be very useful). this is why i came to you and felt the need to take the time to help you. listen to me: no sixteen year old should ever be in such a dark place that they say these words “I feel as if i’ve been on an endless search my entire life.” i am happy however to say that you are very wise for your age, many teens, even some adults, do not recognize this until it is too late. this endless search you speak of is what GROWTH is all about. please, understand me because i know all too well the mindset you are in right now. you say you are in need of something to fill the emptiness inside of you. one question, would you say that you feel happy with the person that you are? are you somebody that struggles with confidence and security in yourself? i know all too well what that is like. here is the thing. right now you are reading the words of a 16 year old as well. me. i apologize if i sound like a weird spiritual person who is trying too hard to sound smart. but this is me being as genuine and as compassionate as i can be. you need some words of encouragement. we are so fortunate to have such a long and eventful life in front of us to decide how we want to grow, and who we want to be as people. you seem like a very smart and observant person who is very good at picking up on what your heart is telling you. its really a beautiful thing that you are driven to find out what you are searching for. i cannot tell you what that thing is. i cannot help you any more than by giving you words of whatever wisdom i may have. every individual on this planet has, is, and was once in your position. being lost can be bad and good. in your case it sounds more like a negative… you are definitely being brought down by it, maybe even into a state of depression… its also very possible that you struggle with anxiety.(trust me, i would know. i am on anti-anxiety/ anti-depressants because of that exact reason). i am sure you have given some thought into how teaching yourself to look at the positive side could really improve your frame of mind? it is so cliché and overstressed, being positive. but it would amaze you how big of a change it makes. sorry if my response went off topic a few times. i find that writing makes my thoughts flow sometimes a bit too fast, and i just feel the impulse to write them all down.
long story short: you are needing to be reminded that there is still more of your life left to live, you are so young and have more time to grow than you could ever imagine. this difficult time of feeling lost and lacking motivation is something so much like what i went through not even much longer than a year ago. nobody really knows how confidence comes, it just sort of happens. when you seek inspiration, and REALLY tune in to what your inner self is feeling and trying to express, it is truly amazing how much you can learn and apply to your life. don’t pressure yourself and convince yourself that you HAVE to keep writing. do something else that may unlock your creativity in a similar way that writing does. if not, then think of it this way. you cannot EXPECT yourself to be able to dive right in to picking up your pen and writing in the condition that you are in. forget about the writing for now. i really think your main objective should be to do some serious soul searching and truly make an effort to figure out what inspires you. do things that make you feel good about yourself, like you are CAPABLE of achieving goals. again, don’t start with the writing if you are lacking motivation. really just think about what kind of person you want to be and go after it. for me, i still don’t even know who i want to be. i found inspiration through art, and practicing yoga. (now don’t get me wrong I’m not like a super spiritual person), yoga just made me feel good mentally and physically, and it also really felt amazing to know that i was taking the initiative to get in my car and GO to yoga. i felt like i was accomplishing something. see thats what i mean, it can be something as simple as just getting something done. also another very good thing is to become observant of life around you. really notice things about people, and seriously take the time to appreciate those things. appreciate, appreciate, appreciate. i think I’ve said enough……. i really do hope you can find yourself and that maybe i was somewhat of a help.
life is special. and the best way to live a fulfilling life is to love yourself, and appreciate others. always try to maintain your happiness- if you aren’t happy, you are not living, you are just existing. by writing this super long response it made me feel good because i was taking the time to care, and i really genuinely do care. i hope this time of hopelessness you feel will not last much longer at all!! -
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