I’m sure others are going to respond with a lot more compassion, composure, and clarity, but let me just start off by going with my gut on this one and saying there’s a whole lot of wrong going on in this scenario! As in WTF?! 😉

I hear where you’re coming from – this could be a potentially profitable transaction and given your financial insecurities, it could alleviate a lot of stress and anxiety. But is this really the way you want to do it? Without a wholesome and sold foundation on which to build a relationship, mixing money, the law, emotions, and sex is a recipe for disaster.

Please get some legal advice before moving further. I’ve heard stories of people of marrying people from other countries only to be left paying their bills and debts. If for whatever reason this guy starts having any legal or financial troubles, you could be liable to cover the costs. If you divorce as soon as he gets his green card, there could be a legal investigation and you could be charged.

I know you’re feeling very stressed and anxious about money, but marrying for money and financial security, regardless of whether its a real marriage or a fake one, puts you in a state of dependance and will further undermine your efforts to become independent and financially stable.

I had a friend who did this and 8 years later she is still dealing with the financial mess left to her from her “husband,” not to mention she had a visit from INS recently. Apparently, he was getting ready to take the Bar exam in her state and when the State was investigating his background they found “issues” surrounding their marriage, divorce and his Green Card. They notified INS. My friend never told her current husband about her past marriage …Surprise!!

Here is the deal, you’re committing immigration fraud, and the naturalization process is increasingly rigorous to reveal these crimes. Immigration Fraud is a felony but how frequently it is prosecuted after deportation isn’t clear. You can be assured since 9/11 the INS and Justice Department isn’t hesitant about prosecuting these crimes and they aren’t afraid to ask to seek incarceration.

The INS vigorously investigates anonymous tips, so if there is anyone in your life who dislikes you enough to make a phone call and report your fraudulent relationship, you’ll have to overcome suspicion and your friend risks deportation and you risk prosecution.

The process is a pain, INS Agents will make unannounced visits at your door and are expected to be allowed into your shared residence. You can deny them entry but doing so will end the immigration process and initiate deportation process which you can formally appeal. I went with friends that were really in love and it was crazy. I was interviewed by INS about what I knew about their relationship. The couple was each interviewed separately and they asked all sorts of personal relationship question and questions about their home. I do not know if it is a requirement to have a witness but if it is, you will need someone willing to lie for you.

Even if you pass the process and your friend attains his green card but the INS becomes suspicious afterwards, you can still be prosecuted and he can still be deported long after.

Is this guy worth it?

• This reply was modified 10 years, 9 months ago by Janis.
• This reply was modified 10 years, 9 months ago by Janis.