I’ll try to keep this as short as I can. I married my high school sweet heart. We were each other’s first. Been together for 19 years, married for 13. We have 4 kids ages 14-2. I’ve had that gut feeling for awhile that something wasn’t right and found out through cell phone records that she’s been talking to another guy for over a year. Numerous times a day, hours and hours nearly every day. She’s a stay at home mom btw. After going round and round with her she finally admits that she cheated on me. This guy is married and has kids of his own also. I wanted to save the marriage and was willing to work it out but she wanted no part of me and lied on a protected order to get me out of the house so she could continue her affair. Quickly a little about me: I’ve never abused her in any way shape or form. But I did drink, almost daily but never abused it. What I did do was ignore her for a long time. I got complacent in the relationship. I wasn’t there to fill her emotional needs and she filled that with this other guy. I get all that. I immediately stopped drinking and haven’t touched it in nearly a year. I completely changed my lifestyle and lost a ton of weight. Back to the story…I made it through the depression and bounced back. Not sure how I did it but I did. I have my kids 3 days a week and everything is going ok until 5-6 months ago his wife messages me on instagram and told me that he left my wife so they could fix their marriage. During this time our divorce wasn’t final because she was using every stall tactic that she could because she knew she was going to lose the house.  Anyway, around that time my wife all of a sudden started coming by my place unannounced, doing random drive bys, having the kids knock at my door, stalking me, sending angry texts, calling my job to see if I was there etc. Had to get the lawyers involved and that behavior finally stopped. Where I’m at now is I find myself thinking about how easily it was for her to throw me away. I never treated her bad, not anyway to justify the way she went about doing it. I’ve been over it all, moved on. The pain isn’t there anymore but I feel that whole closure thing creeping on me. She has never apologized for what she’s done. And that’s been the only thing I haven’t been able to let go yet. And I know I may never get it. Does anyone have any advice for me? Any questions or anything I can ask myself or tell myself to finally let this go?