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Move abroad to work for a year or stay with Husbad

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Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)
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  • March 9, 2018 at 6:41 am #196477
    rupan
    Participant

    Hello everyone !

    I read a similar post on this website that totally resonated with me .

    I ‘ m 31 years old and have been with my husband for 10 years ( 2.5 years married)He’s my best friend and I can’t imagine my life without him.  Also, I’ve  had the same job since I graduated university ( I’ m a nurse) at the same hospital. I’ve always dreamed of working at this hospital and it was  a dream come true to work in it right away from university.

    However, I’ve reached a point in my life that my life is so routine, that I’m scared that I will not change or grow . It terrifies me that I will have the exact same life at 41. My husband and I travel at least once a year to a different country, but I’ve always wanted to work abroad, specifically teach english overseas. However, I’ve always been scared of losing stability in my life ( job, husband) I’ve been to afraid to leave my comfort zone. My husband wants us to start trying for kids in the next year, and it scares me that once I have kids ,my routines will be set in stone and I will never be able to have these types of adventures again. My work has agreed to give me a leave of absence of 3 months but the school abroad has a contract for a year.So I have to  quit my job to live in another country without my husband ( he will visit me at least 2-3 times a year) or volunteer for 3 months. I guess I want to be recharged after 10 years of routine and I don’t know what option will be best for me mentally. I’ve tried talking to my husband but he does not want to steer me in a direction that makes my choice biased towards him. Hence, Im here lol, looking for advice!

    March 9, 2018 at 7:15 am #196485
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear rupan:

    It reads like you want to have an adventure before being confined to the routine and responsibilities of working in the hospital and parenting children for the next decades. And after you have that adventure, having got that desire satisfied, you will be ready for the planned routines of work and parenting.

    But there is another possibility: that following the adventure, when you come back home, the same confinement expected is still a problem. Only now, you have already done the adventure, so you can’t have another and there is… the dreaded routine.

    Your thoughts?

    anita

    March 9, 2018 at 7:25 am #196487
    rupan
    Participant

    Hi Anita! Thanks so much for your reply!!

    When I proposed my plan to my husband initially, he told me the same thing. To definitely take this opportunity, (whether it be three months or a year ) but have or do something in my life where I wont be restless or itching to get out of the routine.

    I guess it’s more what I want to get out of this opportunity. I feel like I’ve been in this bubble for so long that I can’t think outside the box. I feel like if I’m taken away from from the life I am living now I can change mentally (if that makes sense). However,I just don’t know if its worth quitting my job and go for a year or take a leave and just try something for three months.

    March 9, 2018 at 7:32 am #196493
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear rupan:

    You ae welcome. Trying something for three months reads to me like the better option, considering that you have a good job, your dream job and your dream workplace and considering you have a loving husband.

    If you think it may help, will you share more about the fear that you will have the exact same life at 41: what about this life is terrifying? And what is this bubble you mentioned in your second post?

    anita

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