Dear Miranam.

About the shift in curiosity that I was talking about, I think I might not have been clear. I have developed a deep curiosity about myself, why I think in a particular way and do things correspondingly. To understand all the complexities that goes in to forming me has become a new  interest for me. I assume that the person that I am interacting with is also a sum total of all his/her circumstances. So all interactions become a source of knowledge for me – one by the way I interact with them I know what is happening in me and secondly observing their words and actions give an insight in to what goes on in them. Being empathetic adds an additional element by making me imagine what I had do in their situations or circumstances. Overall this has helped me with conversations. I do agree that small talk and similar can drain us really badly but there is always a possibility of learning even in them.

Lowering expectations and effect on passion for life – I am not sure I completely understand that. I still believe that passion is an essential component to life and I wouldn’t compromise on that. Maybe recalibrating what passion means depending on what situations prevail at one point in time is what is needed.

Hope to read more from you as your progress on your journey. Always a pleasure communicating with you.

Take care.

Dear Miranam,

This exchange has been very fruitful for me too. After I read your last post, I was relooking at how automatic patterns tend to recur in my life. Specific situations and behaviors tend to elicit specific lines of thought. With mindfulness, I am aware of what happens and with conscious effort it is possible to change the line of thought. But as you said it is hardwork and difficult but the effort is totally worth it. I used to think that there should be an ease to it if it is “natural” but if “natural” or default mode is not leading to what I want then effort even if it is difficult is totally worth it when it leads to betterment.

I liked the way you defined passion and expectation. Passion – a strong emotional investment into something which has an outcome. Expectation – a desire for an outcome.

And yes I believe when the outcome or goal is something that you keep in the realm of our own control, then passion can be kept alive on an ongoing basis. Joy and fulfillment can be felt as and when it is achieved; even after achieving it you create more achievable outcomes and the joy should grow.