Hello All,
I have recently came across a reoccurring dilemma with which I have found myself in over and over again throughout my whole life. It just so happens that lately, it’s very relevant in my life choices. I am currently enrolled in college after moving back from Kauai, and am living with my aunt&uncle in Florida. For the sake of context, I’ll be brief with why I’ve felt as though I do not belong anywhere. As a child, I moved around a lot–going between family members’ houses, to around the country. Even as a child, I felt out of place everywhere, and I was never completely comfortable in my environment, even though I was with loving family. Now as a young adult, I feel as though I have been a burden on my family by going from place to place due to my indecisiveness. I want to find a place that I belong, and the part that saddens me is that I cannot feel at home with my own family.
I would like to know if anyone has any insight as to why I would feel this way towards my environments and how I can actually make a place feel comfortable, stable, and not like I’m intruding. Maybe it’s senseless guilt, maybe it’s my own insecurities about never being in one place at a time. I’m not sure what it is, but I desperately want to feel like I belong. If I can’t feel at home in my own house with my own family, then how will I ever feel at home anywhere else?
Thank you,
Liz