- This topic has 3 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 7 months ago by Bubble.
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March 24, 2017 at 8:52 am #141487BubbleParticipant
Hello Everyone,
I’m currently feeling pretty low. My employment contract finished at the end of 2016 and since then I am struggling to find another role (I’m British, in Switzerland). I have a PhD in chemistry and recently got an MBA (2015), but these are so far getting me no-where. I worked at a very large scientific research organisation, which was very male-dominated (I’m female). After having a baby at the start of 2016, things changed at work and suddenly the contract that was going to be made permanent was taken away. I have watched as lesser qualified and experienced (and less hard-working) men promoted past me and head-hunted away. I’ve done all I can to position myself and just feel invisible. And now I’m unemployed, I feel like no-one wants me at all.
I’m asking myself what the hell was the point of spending years at university (and significant sums of money)? I had post-natal depression after a difficult pregnancy and birth complications, but just as I seem to have come through that, I can feel myself slipping back and am concerned. I am also very angry and indignant – I just can’t seem to let go of the injustices I feel about my work and career, and this is also holding me back.
Anyone else had similar experiences? How did you get through it?
Thanks for reading,
Bubble
March 24, 2017 at 9:29 am #141495AnonymousGuestDear Bubble:
I did not have a similar experience in the workplace, and I never became a mother. I hope someone who does have these experiences will answer you. If you have any question or request for input that I can give you as neither a mother nor a highly educated, unemployed individual as you, let me know.
anita
March 24, 2017 at 1:52 pm #141559RamoneJosephParticipantBubbles,
Reoccurring themes I am hearing at the moment from many different people are those of unfairness, injustice, comparisons to others successes. Unfortunately there is no fairness in this life! We are dealt what we are dealt and it is our decision to react as we choose. Can you believe that there is some young lady here in America who is currently garnering huge media attention and scooping up endorsement after endorsement for babbling some incoherent garbage on a talk show? Is that fair? Does it make sense to someone who believes they should be given such opportunities for skills they deem more important to society? No, it probably isn’t fair and doesn’t make sense, but it’s an example of how things work…
The things that have happened to you and are directly affecting you seem painful and horrible to you also, but I guarantee there is someone “less fortunate” who could easily look at your life and accomplishments and ask, how is that fair?
You can let life kick you in the crotch and cry about it, or you can stand up and kick the bastard back! Anger and indignation will eat you alive if you don’t get rid of them. That doesn’t mean they aren’t useful tools. Use those feelings to motivate and launch yourself into the next phase of your life and then quickly let them go… Your successes and failures are your own and whether you win or lose you will want to at least be able to say you tried. I’m currently rebuilding myself after a devastating occurrence in my life last year and I know it’s so easy to stay stuck in the misery and wonder what’s the use? My best help has been not to microscopically dissect the past trying to figure out what went wrong. It’s over, it’s done, you can’t time travel to fix it. take the lesson an move on. Also, don’t let the future drive you insane! Dwelling to far ahead in the future and worrying about it will distract you from the present. That’s where you want to be, in the present. That’s where you will focus and shape your life. Start small, set goals and celebrate every success like you won the lottery! Each little success will roll into the next one, and pretty soon you’ll have a giant snowball of good things. Just don’t let the occasional drawback slow you down too much. Sh!t happens, roll with it…
Wishing you health and happiness,
Ramone
March 28, 2017 at 1:09 pm #142591BubbleParticipantDear Ramone,
Thanks for taking the time to write such a detailed reply. Your comment about living in the present and not dwelling too much on past an future is really on the mark. I’ve been consciously doing this over the last few days and it has most certainly helped me.
Good luck to you too,
All the best
Bubble
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