Over 40 and looking for a new Direction…

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    Hi, I can say there is no rush, once you do have kids, I have three, one was an unplanned new baby, life gets quite busy and you don’t remember what you did with your life before. The right person can come at any time, sometimes its the wrong time. If you are mindful and relaxed then you will be ready. I missed out in the past due to my anxiety levels.

    Until then just enjoy the life you have and that time you’ve been given. I’m a retained firefighter and have seen so many people killed on their way to work or coming home from somewhere – and it really makes me aware that our time is so limited. Hope that is useful.


    Thank you, Neil. I appreciate your response and support, greatly.


    My question is – how do you find what you are called to do?

    Devi Clark

    Hi everyone. I am a career coach, and this is a problem that thousands of people have. That is meant to be reassuraing, because it is also something that can be overcome. Here are some thoughts:

    Thinking your way into a new career is almost impossible. How can you know what something is like if you haven’t experienced it?

    That means you have to get into action. At first glance this may seem strange. How can you act if you don’t know what you want?

    Well, first you do a mini-brainstorm of things that you have ever liked. It doesn’t matter what. Helping people? Working with animals? Working with numbers? Writing? Painting? Gardening? Running events? Don’t worry about what is on your list or whether it feels like a job thing. One client recently said he was the person his collegues came to when they wanted to talk to someone, which led to us exploring mentoring as an option.

    Then take your list and brainstorm any jobs or organisations you can think of that might use these skills. You might also involved family and friends in this brainstorm.

    Then you want to find ways to experience it, even if only for a short time. some ways to do that are:

    * volunteer for a charity
    * find someone who already does that kind of work and ring then and ask what it is actually like doing their job (don’t ask for advice on how to get this job, that is a turn off for them: ask for what their job inolves day to day and what sort of people do well)
    * see if you can shadow someone for a few hours to experience what they do

    Ask your friends for contacts. Try things you haven’t done before, but which appeal to you or your friends think might suit you.

    Trying things out, without commitment at this stage, is the best way to find out what you love.

    And if you find yourself procrastinating, buddy up with someone. Hold each other accountable.

    Good luck!


    Howard Williams

    You might look into getting a life coach. Not a therapist, a seasoned, experience life coach. It sounds like you’re looking for direction from all the same old sources and they are working. why not try something like a coach to help you get a new direction and clean up what is getting in your way. The answers you’re looking for are not outside of you. Growing and exploring yourself will more likely produce better results. Been there, done that.


    Hi Craig…

    I just ran across your post and see you have an abundance of replies but felt compelled to share in the conversation anyway. I’ve been experiencing the “40 something longing for a change” for several years and like you have jumped from one thing to another. Nothing seems to really stick although I’ve accumulated a few tools for the tool box along the way

    What I imagine is something I’m passionate about, lose myself in and in a perfect world, earn a living at. The most helpful advice I’ve read to find that “thing” is to think about what has inspired you to the point that it brings you to tears.

    Another important point mentioned earlier is to enjoy each moment and not lose ourselves in the seeking. The books that helped me most during this time are The Power of Now and A New Earth.

    Good luck in finding your passion


    best book (finding meaning in the second half of life)

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