Overwhelming Anxiety is Making Me Procrastinate

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This topic has 5 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated 10 years, 10 months ago by Michelle.

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February 10, 2014 at 11:57 am #50683

Heather
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I have dealt with anxiety for as long as I can remember. Even as a child, I was constantly worried about externalities beyond my control. I especially fear what others think of me, typically assuming it must be negative. Now, at 24, so many years of these thoughts are finally starting to catch up with me. I used to be able to feign happiness, had a decent amount of friends, and could function very well in school and at work without letting my anxiety get the better of me.

I am coming to the end of my first year in graduate school and something has shifted. I am so anxious now that the thought of even writing a paper terrifies me to the point that I will procrastinate and perform way below my capabilities. Even though I am aware of this issue, I can’t seem to shake the overwhelming anxiety which cripples me every time I sit down to write a paper, read a book, or prepare a presentation. I literally develop physical fear responses akin to mini panic attacks over these seemingly menial tasks. What scares me is that I used to be able to avoid my anxiety, push it to the back of my mind until my work was done and deal with it later. I have no idea what’s changed but I’m afraid if it continues to get worse I won’t be able to function at all. I feel so overwhelmed.

February 10, 2014 at 1:22 pm #50689

Jessica Caver Lindholm
Participant

Hi Heather,

I totally understand where you’re coming from. Have you been able to talk to anyone about how you’re feeling or do you feel like you have to keep it all locked inside and keep up a facade that everything’s perfect? I was a bit of an overachiever growing up and always felt pressed to be perfect. It took years of working through these feelings and expectations to get clear on what actually makes me feel happy and move forward with that. I think once you’re able to reconnect to who you really are and realize that you’re perfect right now exactly as you are without completing another assignment, then you’ll be able to move forward with a sense of relief and freedom in your life (and accomplish your work without overwhelm).

I’d be happy to offer you a free mentoring session if you’d like to talk this out and get some relief. I’m a Freedom Coach and I mentor women to thrive in life. I’m 29 now and have my own business at http://www.JessicaCaver.com but it took me years to get to a place where I value and honor myself and feel complete peace in just being me. If you’re interested please head over to my website and send me a message and we can set something up soon.

All the best!
Jessica

February 10, 2014 at 1:32 pm #50691

Mark
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I’m sorry about your overwhelming anxiety Heather.

I am wondering if you have tried to address it with therapy, medication, meditation or other approaches?

I did not have such a powerful response to my anxiety but I got it “cured” with an energy therapy healing process called Body Talk. You can Google it and if you care to pursue it then there are practitioners listed on the IBA Global Healing site or Google under the search words Body Talk and your own geographical location. I know that some practitioners do distance healing as well.

I do find meditation is good regardless I have anxiety or not for it provides a nice foundation for being mindful.
When I find powerful negative emotions such as anxiety, fear, or anger, I go do my meditation and just BE with that emotion, to breath into it with acceptance. I find that helps a lot. The very act of not trying to push it away or distract myself from the emotion helps me to be with myself and all that entails.

Let me know how you are doing.

Metta,
Mark

February 11, 2014 at 6:06 am #50754

sri
Participant

Hi Heather!
I totally understand how you feel..Am doing my Master’s and planning to enrol in a Grad school soon. From What I know Grad school can be very stressful, so You are not alone and nor are you solely responsible for the state you are in. Try not to get caught in a vicious self pity cycle. I know, I’ve been there. I got an opportunity to do my internship in a wonderful place, Unfortunately my anxiety got the better of me and I didn’t do my best. Just Let go..It’s okay if you can’t do well sometimes. Am sure you will find the strength to work soon. I’ve always found and So will you. Accept yourself wholly. Take it slow and easy. One thing at a time..You could get your work done that way. You could try meditation or therapy. I’ve found solace in Zen Buddhism. I forgot the source of this quote” Remember there is nowhere to go, nothing to do and nothing to achieve so stay in the present moment”
I hope you are back to being fully functional soon but no hurries! You will get there.
Love,
Sridevi K

February 11, 2014 at 7:48 am #50765

MuZeta
Participant

Hi Heather,
I’d just like to let you know that you are not alone! I suffered from very similar anxiety last year where I would sit down to read papers and I would burst into tears. But it got better, and it will get better for you too. Sri is right, for me too it was about letting go and not putting so much pressure on myself. I know this sounds quite abstract, I was baffled by such advice myself. For me, the university councellors really helped me get on my way to recovery and I also did a self improvement programme online. But ultimately, for me what worked was proactively building new habits like yoga and meditation in the morning and committing to one hour of work everyday. It wasn’t a quick fix but it got better slowly and I tried lots of things before I found what workes best for me.

I would recommend reaching out to get help from a councellor because an outside perspective helps to break the cycle of negative thoughts and feelings.
I really wish you the best of luck

Mu xx

February 11, 2014 at 12:51 pm #50787

Michelle
Participant

Hi Heather!

I totally know exactly how you feel. I’m 33 and I am still challenged with this on a daily basis! I do so many things to try to deal with it. I take medication to help take the edge off. I don’t take as much medication as I need though. I don’t want to be really drugged up so I take a small dose of medication. I also go to therapy on a regular basis (about every 4 weeks at this point). I read self-help books, I practice yoga and other excericise, I *try* to meditate, I have loving pets at home, and most recently I’ve been learning to focus my energy into everything I do and be more mindful. All of this stuff helps. It is a lot of work and I’m still suffering from this every day, but it is worth it and I know that I’m not alone, and neither are you! HUGS,

Michelle
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