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Recently diangoised with depression

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Viewing 7 posts - 1 through 7 (of 7 total)
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  • #89831
    Claire
    Participant

    With alot of childhood issues. In therapy atm. Family members wont stop sabataging my business and my persoanl life with threats. How can i get out of this hole that im in ?
    I want my life back.

    #89833
    Nekoshema
    Participant

    How are they sabotaging your life exactly? If it’s a misunderstanding you could try calmly explaining your feelings and views, but be sure it’s the right time, try to be honest but not malicious, and really listen when they speak [Also, problem in my family, if there’s a tendency to cut people off, ask them to wait, or maybe try a held object, so people have to be quiet until they have said object] of course, sometimes it’s a deeper problem and you’re probably not in the best space emotionally, so if you’ve had years of negativity you might consider cutting ties for the time being. You might still love them, but they could be toxic to your recovery. I have that problem with my grandparents, I love them but they’re very hurtful on certain topics [They mean well but they belief ‘cruel to be kind’ you know?] If someone’s unwilling to change, you need to be a little selfish and heal yourself.

    You could also try meditation, journaling, exercise, and doing things you love. I have depression so I know it can be difficult, but start small, put on a CD you like to dance to, or a movie that makes you smile. I keep a list with me of things I love [people, places, things, activities] and whenever I remember something I add to it. When I’m low it’s nice to read. [I don’t know if you’re the same, but it’s hard to think of something good when your on a down day. Just contradictions] mindfulness also helped me a lot, as did TinyBuddha [thanks guys btw] you might also consider cleaning out your cupboards and filling them with nutritious food. Kind of a no brainer, but the food you eat can effect your whole day. You don’t need to become vegan [unless you want to] I’ve cut out almost all ‘junk food’ and eat a lot more fruits and vegetables [I still eat meat but only for dinner] and I actually noticed a difference not just in my health but my mental too. When I was depressed I grabbed what was convent only to mentally beat myself up for eating a bag of chips [or whatever] which kept the circle going.

    #89835
    Peppermint
    Participant

    Dear Claire,

    I love your profilename “sunshineclaire”. Beautiful.
    It sounds as if you are under a lot of pressure: childhood issues, family issues, depression.
    You asked how you can get out of this situation, but I’m afraid there might be no easy answer for it. Healing from depression takes time. Therapy is a good start! Do you feel in good hands with your therapist?
    As for what you can do yourself – easiest way to start is to do something nice for yourself. It doesn’t have to be anything big. How about going to a nice cafe and drink a cup of tea/coffee/cocoa? And yes, I know that may sound ridiculous to your right now. How is that supposed to help? Maybe you feel like doing nothing. But why not give it a try? What can you loose?

    • This reply was modified 8 years, 12 months ago by Peppermint.
    #89922
    Claire
    Participant

    Thsnk you guys. yesteeday my doctor explained that my depression started from when i was a child it beens more than 15 years that i didnt know of. My family blamed me for making myself sick and my sister discriminate coz she thinks ppl like me is weak. At least 2 times a week they will come to prvoke me. My mom is ashamed that i have depression and asked the person that is helping me to not tall tonanyone about it. Yea sunshine is what i need in my life now and im hoping to be well.

    I was a child when i got this. I was innocent and i dont understand why they dont see this. My sister even allow my brother in law to insult me and call me weak. With absolutely no family support, will it be possible ?!

    Thank you verybmuch for your time. These days tiny buddha did help calm me down.

    Im really thankful form your time.

    #89931
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Claire:

    You wrote that you have “absolutely no family support” that your family blames you, discriminate against you, call you weak, provoke you, ashamed of you…

    There is something you are not seeing, I believe:

    It is not that you were depressed and then your family mistreated you.

    First, your family mistreated you. As a result of that, you became depressed.

    Your depression is not something you were born with, or a germ you caught, a disease you caught somehow. It is a RESULT of being mistreated again and again as a child.

    anita

    #89937
    Claire
    Participant

    U r right about this anita. They dont see it that way m. They blame me for everything. Im leaving next week from them and i hope this could do me better. Will i be normal again with family support ? I want to be normal get a bf and get married in the future. Bu doing that i need to treat myself first.

    Im so ready to get back on track. Bu cutting my family off, is it possible for my recovery?

    Thanks

    #89938
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Claire:

    Cutting your abusive family off is an excellent move. You will still have challenges because the harm they already did will stay with you wherever you go until you HEAL from that damage, that hurt and injury. It will take time and effort, good psychotherapy will be very helpful. But moving away from such abuse is NECESSARY. Good for you that you realize moving away is necessary and that you are following it through!

    anita

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