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This topic contains 2 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  Peter 1 week, 2 days ago.

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  • #334918

    Mona
    Participant

    I’ve always disliked myself and feel like I don’t fit in or belong anywhere. I felt like this since I can remember. I plan to do  something and then change my mind and stay home. I often think others don’t like me and don’t want to be with me. How can I get out of this ? Can I ever feel like a decent person?

    #334926

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Mona:

    “I often think others don’t like me and don’t want to be with me. How can I get out of this?”-

    – in your previous thread I asked you a question but you didn’t answer me or post again. That’s okay, you don’t have to answer my questions. Maybe you don’t want to be asked questions, and that’s okay too. But if you want to have a conversation with me, we can converse and maybe you will find out that as a result of our conversation, I will like you. That may help. If you want you can ask me a question next and I will answer, if I am okay with the question, of course.

    anita

    #337474

    Peter
    Participant

    Hi Mona

    Its important to distinguish the difference between Self care and Self comfort. More often then not we choose the latter, comfort. And by comfort a means to avoid anything that might causes us anxiety, uncertainty or taking a chance.

    How to get out of this? Be honest with yourself.  Stop when you notice your telling yourself a story, that others don’t like you…. Ask yourself if this a excuse to stop yourself from engaging. Dos the thought of engaging leave you feeling uncomfortable? Is that self care or self comfort?

    Your not alone. Speaking for myself I tend towards self comfort, comfort being avoidance of social situations that I fear will overwhelm me. I tell myself I’m not good enough, will mess things up, they won’t like me. But its all a excuse not to engage and remain as I am. Self comfort can easily becomes self abuse and not comfortable at all.

    Self care is being honest and trusting oneself, its having healthy boundaries. Others will be attracted by that.

     

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