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Should I bother him?

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  • December 4, 2014 at 8:50 am #68720
    D
    Participant

    I broke up with my ex in 2011. I was unhappy. Not because he wasn’t good to me or because our relationship was bad, in fact he made me feel amazing; I was just uphappy.

    We ended up going our seprate ways, but still stayed in contact. In hindsight, I think he didn’t fight for me to stay because he thinks he was the cause of what was making me unhappy.

    With him gone, I was unhappy and heart broken, even though I was the one who initiated the break up.

    In early 2012, I was diagnosed with a rare condition. I had never been a depressed person, so I had no clue that’s what the condition was causing. I was depressed by the condition. A simple food change, and I was healthy and happy.

    Well, sort of happy. I want my ex back. He and I spoke once before about getting back together, but he asked me what would change… and I had no answer for him.

    Now I realize everything would change. I’m not unhappy. I know why ever thing before just made me sad. I feel like I could appreciate everything he is and everything we were now that I’m not in chronic depression.

    I tried to forget about him… but I keep having dreams that are happening more and more often now. I wake up in tears because I keep desperately trying to get back to him, but I just can’t seem to.

    I suppose the whole point of this post is to get opinions. It’s been 3 years since we’ve broken up and I still think of him constantly. I still want him, especially now that I’m not clouded by depression and know how to stay healthy.

    Do I burden him with my emotions and tell him I want to try again, or do I just let him go?

    December 4, 2014 at 8:54 am #68721
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    The question really, is – Can you let it go?
    Not sure when you last spoke to him, but if he’s single then I say, go for it.
    It’s better to know you tried, rather than dwell the rest of your life on what might have been.
    Love is complicated.
    I hope it works out for the best.

    December 4, 2014 at 9:08 am #68722
    D
    Participant

    I think if I talked to him about it all and he still says no, then maybe I could let it go.I’ve tried in the past, but for some reasons these dreams will come out of nowhere.

    We spoke two days ago, well texted. Over a couple hours we caught up and it felt like old times when we’d talk. He single, I’m single. I might be reading far too much into it, but he sent a “;)” for the first time in years. ha ha who knows?

    He knows about the condition, but I never told him about the mental effects. Just the physical ones.

    I keep hearing peoplr say “and ex is an ex for a reason”, but should I say screw it and let him know?

    December 4, 2014 at 9:38 am #68727
    Anne
    Participant

    Mybe try a couple of casual over-coffee meets first, but I’d say go for it. I’ve heard the whole “an ex is an ex for a reason” thing too, but we are different people every time we wake up in the morning. Nothing you’ve said indicates any reason why you shouldn’t have as good a shot as anyone, provided you can start afresh and leave the past behind you.

    December 8, 2014 at 11:28 pm #68952
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    The #1 most important thing is to establish contact. People have seem to have lost touch with reality but not being able to act like normal human being. That is by hiding behind technology like computers and cell phones, it’s really pathetic the way the human race has become. I am so old school, if I want to talk to someone I’d rather sit down and talk face to face. No texting, no emails or Skype. I’m a person who likes to face reality and that is facing the person I love and wanting to know where they emotionally stand by speaking to them in person. It’s clear that so many people are in constant fear in facing the truth, which to me, truth is light and light = Purity. I believe so many people wouldn’t be so un-happy if they stopped letting technology speak for them. We are not robots, we are real people. So in regards to your topic D, I believe you should really discuss all these feelings with the person you love in person, face to face.

    People would be such happier beings/souls if they just started to reverse the affects of technology and get back in touch with the human race by spending time outdoors with each other. Live life, as there are so many wonderful things to this life. If you love someone, embrace it and make it known to them, as the touch of another soul does wonders. Here is something I saw on Facebook that was very empowering and had a lot of wisdom. Thanks in part to a friend who posted this as her status earlier today as it makes complete sense -https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=815922958487006&set=vb.234859083260066&type=2&theater

    Hope this helps. if you have anymore questions feel free to comment back.

    December 9, 2014 at 12:25 am #68956
    popi
    Participant

    i think that you must chase the good in your life.
    this situation (want sth back) cause you stress and can’t give you stability.
    this can only upset you,can’t you see?
    and it can effect your health.
    try to realise that,and ask yourelf if every action you make cause you happiness or unhappiness.
    i think that when you will truly fell happy with yourself and your life 100% you will not wanting ANY ex or any difficult situation like this.
    because wanting something or someone back,means that you have regrets or unhappy feelings in your life.
    i know it’s sometimes difficult to let go, i must say that i lived this way in a time,and maybe sometimes these feelings make me unhappy,but it’s in your hand to get over all these and try to find sth good in your life.

    December 9, 2014 at 12:35 am #68957
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Mr. Pop – I believe D has a right to make his or her decision on wanting to get back with their ex. Sometimes things do work out with ex’s because they take the time to work on their relationship, instead of taking the easy way out. See, this is exactly why I don’t particularly like these forums because people here think they know your life, know you and your emotions when they have never even met you. The healthy thing to do is to not judge because you aren’t in this persons shoes to know how they feel and what is best for them. Let them be and let them feel how they want to feel. you are not here to steer the wheel but to be a friendly passenger to ride along as they tell their story. If they want to go back to their ex and that’s what makes them happy, then let them. We are here to be neutral and positive. Not to act like we know everything about people not these forums. Live & let live. Quote: “All relationships go through hell, real relationships get through it.” 🙂 <3

    December 9, 2014 at 12:43 am #68960
    popi
    Participant

    mrs popi,not mr pop.
    and this is your opinion,its okay.
    mine is this above.
    good morning.

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