fbpx
Menu

Should I end my relationship?

Home→Forums→Relationships→Should I end my relationship?

New Reply
Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • February 20, 2015 at 9:41 am #73070
    Confused
    Participant

    I have been with this man for 8 months. We fell head over heels in love with each other and 4 months later he moved in with me. Ever since then, he has been emotionally detached from me. We went through some rough times mainly due to some bad decisions he has made, which made me very angry and I acted out. He stopped being affectionate and seems to be in his own little world. He does not communicate with me anymore either. About 30 days ago, he broke up with me stating that he is not happy, but then we agreed to try to make it work. Every time I try to talk to him, he says the relationship is great. This past week he ended up going partying with two girl friends from his home town (he used to live 5 hours away) and I specifically asked him not to stay the night (after I had told him that I wanted to go out and he said no to me). There is nothing romantic with either one (I know this for a fact). Of course, he did not come home. I really feel like I need to end the relationship, but I love him very much. I felt very disrespected by his decision. Am I wrong in feeling this way? He says he loves me, but, to me, actions speak louder than words. Am I trying to hard to make a relationship work when he does not seem to care? We used to be great. We got along great and had fun and talked. I know what I want and it seems like he does not anymore; we used to talk about getting married and having children and it was mainly him. How does a man go from making future plans to just ending a relationship and not putting some effort in trying to make it work? How much longer do you try to make it work before I call it quits? How long is it reasonable to give him to move out? Please help.

    February 20, 2015 at 3:26 pm #73077
    Courtney Colella
    Participant

    I am sorry for the situation you are in. I always say no matter what to always go with your gut, when you are in a quiet place at home (maybe meditating) what does your heart say? It might be scary to admit to yourself that you need to end something since you do love that person very much but in loving someone it sometimes means letting them go for a bit. He sounds like he might not be as emotionally committed then you would like him to be. Since you stated before that he talked about your future together you are surprised by his actions, but you also stated you respect actions more than words. He might not say whether or not he wants this or that with you in the future but his actions should reflect his intentions.After having a conversation with him about how you have been feeling lately maybe you should consider taking a break or living separately for a while to see how much your feelings are substantial for one another concretely, I know this is a scary thought but I believe all relationships have a make or break point and maybe this is it for you and your boyfriend, Good Luck!

    Love

    Court

    February 23, 2015 at 2:04 am #73203
    Will
    Participant

    Next time you try to talk to him, tell him it’s your last try. Tell him what you told us: that he’s not communicating with you anymore, that you feel disrespected, that you wonder why he’s gone from wanting children with you to living in his own little world.

    Tell him: no, things are not great. If you don’t fix this, you’ll need to find your own place to live.

    See if he’s willing to put the work in. If not, there’s your answer. But he might surprise you.

    February 23, 2015 at 4:31 pm #73220
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Take comfort in knowing you are not alone! I recently went through is. We knew each for a cew years but started dating six months ago. We fell in love and he treated me great, for the most part. Then he started being shady and disappearing and acting very disrespectful towards me for no reason. I tried several times to make it work, including making excuses for his behavior. But as the other poster said, you have to go with your gut. Its not easy, but trust me- you will get to the point where you have had enough. Ive learned that when someone shows you who they are, BELIEVE THEM. This is who he is and he most likely will not change. But, as everyone had told me “get rid of him, you can do so much better” – i just wasnt ready. Only you will know when enough is enough. Remember- you DO deserve more than what he is giving you (emotionally) and everyone deserves to be treated with respect. My friend told me, “sometimes love is not enough” and she was right. Just because were in love, does not mean we were meant for each other. Hang in there, be true to yourself and good luck.

  • Author
    Posts
Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)

You must be logged in to reply to this topic. Please log in OR register.