Dear Emma:

I am sorry you’re not doing too well 😔

“I am feeling bad bc of the OCD thoughts…just don’t know what therapy would help best”-

I read (Copilot) that the most effective therapies for OCD typically include a combination of psychotherapy, medication, and self-help strategies. As far as psychotherapy- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is the most widely recommended treatment. As far as medications- Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs) antidepressants are typically used alongside therapy rather than as a standalone treatment.

As far as self-help- Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques Practices like meditation, yoga, and breathing exercises can help reduce stress and increase emotional awareness.

“As to the remark about the boundaries…”- I remember that we talked about boundaries in regard to going to his house, that’s all I remember. (looking at the record..) that happened on June 28.

“I have had in the meantime really do not compare… I just wonder if he feels it too…that nothing compares.”- makes me think of the song “Nothing Compares 2 U” by Sinéad O’Connor. Do you sometimes, or often listen to this song?

“I am so glad that you now learn to trust writing in your own voice, to be honest, I prefer it too…”- thank you, Emma. Yes, it’s way better this way, to go back to writing in my own voice 😊

As to your question at the end of your first of 2 recent post, I don’t understand it. Can you explain to me what you’re asking?

🤍🌿 Anita

Dear Emma:

“My sister is good at shaming others too – whenever she and they suspect someone is showing off, they are met with remarks like ‘who do they think they are?’, and so I do not dare to come out of my shell too much.”-

In my first post in the forums this morning, I wrote in regard to replies I submitted on that thread 2 years ago: “My replies were excellent, if I may say so (I am quite impressed with myself 🙂)”-

I gave myself a compliment even though I was thinking that I may be criticized for complimenting myself, but I did it anyway because I truly think those replies were excellent and if someone else wrote them, I’d tell him or her that those replies were excellent. Why deprive myself of the compliment I’d give others?

The thought just occurred to me: what if you compliment yourself, Emma?

“May I ask, do you have any tips on how to look at a lost love? How to think about it? Everybody says, ‘just keep on dating, he was nothing special’, but for me it feels like we had something special.”-

I think that you are attached to a story where “something special” is still taking place because it’s a comforting story. That something-special is safe from real life challenges. It’s safe in fantasy.

“Ah, the question I asked was: I was wondering since you told me a bit about your background, and (like me?) it may not have been too easy for you as well as me to rely on your own judgment… I usually wear some mask of ‘kindness’ with many people I meet. It’s so tiring. I am trying to be my true self, but how to know what that looks like?”-

I think I understand what you’re asking, but if the following shows that I didn’t, please let me know. I used to doubt myself a whole lot and that was a painful experience. I wasn’t sure about what’s real and what wasn’t. I too wore masks (every adult does, or almost everyone, at times) because I had no idea what my real face was about. I was a stranger to myself and I didn’t trust my thoughts or my feelings to indicate what was true.

Becoming my true self was a dream, something I wanted and dreamed about for so very long.

I am being myself right now, talking to you here. I am not pretending anything, and that.. feels good!

Looking back, when I was a stranger to myself, I still had moments when I was. I think that you’re feeling like your true self when you’re reading those books you told me about, the (I forgot) fantasy books, are they?

Groetjes, 🤍🌿 Anita